Dragon Ball Blackthorned - Emperor Pilaf Saga
by yoshi3000
Summary: The oldest of the Blackthorn children, Ace, ended up getting the GT treatment. Aged down and dumped into the past of Dragon Ball, he'll have to power his way through his "bash brother" Goku. Together, they'll take on the world with Bulma. But, what will change with someone who's already seen it all? (AU) (Canon pairs) (M for mature themes) (COMPLETE) -Part 1 of 6-
1. Crashing Canon

**Dragon Ball Blackthorned**

Outside worlds beyond your comprehension lies a family of reality warpers all under one last name: Blackthorn.

 ** _"_** ** _It's always that tricky thing with a remake, especially when it's something that's well loved. You're coming to something that has a built-in fascination, but with that comes people ready to feel disgruntled that it's being remade at all." – David Tennant_**

* * *

(A/N: All right, some ground rules. I will be following the anime and the manga to do this fic proper, but I will not do any filler (unless it's necessary). However, I will definitely expand on it with references, bonus characters, and so forth from all Dragon Ball media (except the shitty live-action movie). So expect some early-bird cameos. The dialogue will be a bit altered, along with some scenes. This is going to be an A/U with lot more mature scenes for sure. Another thing, unlike the other fics updated chapter by chapter in one. These will be separated by sagas. Another thing, because Ace was sent back in time. He won't get the message on his BlackTab about the Endurion reveal, but he'll get it soon enough.)

* * *

 **Emperor Pilaf Saga**

 **Chapter 1: Crashing Canon!**

* * *

The Dragon World is filled with legends and I don't know how I got into the mix. My name is Ace Blackthorn, I'm from the real world, Earth Prime. I was born and lived all my life in a world, no universe, far away. I was nineteen, a complete dork for the franchise. I collected the manga, DVD boxsets, and posters. I watched every episode of the series (even that unpleasant GT), played most of the games, and even helped edit the wikia for it. Unlike some of my family members, I was aware that our family practically had powers. I had been training to prepare for my own journey and already knew how to fully use the tablet my parents gave me. That day, I was ready to blow the boring world I grew up in to search for adventure. I was fully versed in swordplay, gunplay, martial arts, and ki. Giving the real world the middle finger, I used my powers to leave this world behind, but not without a side effect.

When I woke up, I was in the middle of nowhere. As I got up, I felt shorter. I walked over to a river to look at my reaction. To my surprise, I looked younger. I looked about twelve years of age. Then my eyes widened to realized, I've successfully ended up in the Dragon World and I even had a tail. I already knew I was half Saya-jin thank to my mother's mutation before having us kids.

"So I'm here, that's cool and all. What point in the timeline am I in?" I wondered noticing an orange and black duffel bag. "And I can't believe I got GT'ed!"

When I ended up in this world, I brought with me with a duffel bag which I found had my laptop, a set of throwing knives, my black leather jacket (which could fit the older me), the BlackTab my parents gave me, and manga (FLCL, One Piece, and Sekirei). After wandering through Mount Pazou, I meet Gohan Sr. and a younger Goku.

"Well this may actually play into my favor. It's a bit before the beginning." I thought watching them.

Then thoughts of what happened through Dragon Ball played through my head and I realized this could be awesome. There were fights, girls (though finding one I could form a relationship with was going to be a challenge), and adventure to be had.

So, I stayed with them learning more martial arts and essentially being Goku's "bash brother". I was also there to witness Goku destroy the house and crush Gohan in his Oozaru form. Thankfully by then, I had made special lunar shades to wear to prevent my eyes from absorbing the blutz waves (or whatever they are called). I could have saved Gohan, but things have to happen for timeline not to alter too severely plus he enjoyed being dead. I couldn't alter certain things at risk of screwing up important events, but I did know my being would alter the time anyway. I'm just be along for the ride, mostly.

The real story begins two years later…


	2. Hello, Bulma!

**Chapter 2: What Would You Do for a Dragon Ball? Offer Fanservice!**

* * *

(A/N: May contain a bit of a lime, but this is the first saga. There's going to a lot of that.)

* * *

Two years with Goku was like living on a camp, due to the constant number of outdoor things we did. We lived off the land with little to no electronics. I never really got the chance to use the laptop due to training and keeping the place in check. I did get to read the books, but only while I was alone. But enough of that, let's get on with it.

It was another day on Mount Pazou, Goku was doing the morning chores (i.e. wood chopping) and I was meditating practicing another technique. That's when the Dragon Ball glowed and while Goku thought it was his grandpa speaking to him.

"Ace, Grandpa's speaking to us! What do you think he's saying?" Goku asked me.

I opened my eyes thinking of what to say until "Maybe it's the call of destiny today." slips out.

"Wow, really! Well we could go get something eat then, huh?" Goku said innocently enough.

I decided to join him on his way to river to catch some fish. He stripped to do so, and I didn't. Unlike Goku, I wasn't innocent due to me mentally being nineteen. However, we ended up running into trouble. On cue, Goku kicked a rock out of the way that hit a Sabretooth tiger. It would have chased us because it was really mad, but I gave one mean glare for it to back off. I knew Bulma was coming and considered what was going to happen. A smirk crawled up my face that I could play this to my own edge. Now if Goku's the pure of heart hero, I was the classical anti-hero in a sense. I was basically being a nicer Vegeta. Ironic considering everything. As Goku was dragging the giant fish, I could sense Bulma coming. I probably could have warned Goku, but, for the sake of time, I can't. Plus, it was hilarious. I couldn't believe I was watching the scene play out. I did help lift Bulma's car and throw it to the ground. As Bulma crawled out her damaged car, Goku pulled out his Power Pole.

"Yeesh, now a hideous demon emerges from the monster." Goku said to me. "Ace, let's do this."

"Goku, that's not…. bah screw it. Let's do this!" I remarked.

Bulma came out guns blazing and fired at us. Which brought to question how a sixteen-year-old gets a gun in this world? Since I know she was going to shoot, I dodged everyone she fired and kicked the gun out of her dainty hands. Goku had a bullet hit him.

"Whuh was that?! What're you, a bitch?!" Goku said unaware he actually swore.

"You mean, witch, bro." I said to him chuckling.

"What are you guys? How aren't you dead? How did you dodge those and kick the gun out of my hand?" Bulma said shocked.

"I just can move faster than your mere gun and I felt like mocking your aim." I said flatly.

Goku got up now quite angry, "Ha! Y'think you can hurt me with your stupid magic with little stings like that!? Hah!"

"And you would have two kids dead, so you should be glad we're alive." I said

"Now foul demon, prepare to die! Ace, let's end this beast!" He said raising his pole.

Before he could strike, I used my Bo staff to block his attack saying, "Goku, you dunce! She's not a demon. She's human."

Bulma was professing this hoping she wasn't going to end up dead. I turned to Bulma and said, "You should be lucky, we can resist and dodge your bullets."

"Is it really a human?" Goku said zipping around and looking about. "It seems softer and bumpier."

He used his power pole to hike up Bulma's skirt to use for her "tail". Bulma scolded him for doing that screaming she doesn't have a tail. It really reminds me how much a jerk Bulma can be at times.

"Of course, Goku. It's a she." I said to him, "A girl, you dummy."

Goku had mild surprise on his face and Bulma was relieved. However, she looked mad at me for not telling him sooner.

"Oh! I've never seen human before other than Ace." Goku said looking about. "My dead grandpa always said if I met a girl, treat her nice."

"That's only applies to nice girls, not ones that try to kill you." I said with extreme sarcasm in my tone. "But let's treat her as a guest anyway. C'mon, let's get you some food."

Goku agreed to that, and Bulma remarked, "As long as that's all you do…"

"Hmph, pervert." I mutter under my breath.

As we begun the walk up to the hut, Bulma noted our strength and prowess. Goku remarked his grandpa trained him well but I said something a little different.

"I've trained in multiple forms of combats, swordplay, and gunplay." I said getting a surprise out of Bulma.

"Those two might be bumpkins, but I could their strength." Bulma said to herself as we soon arrived at the old hut.

Goku immediately dropped the giant fist and ran up to the Dragon Ball saying, "Grampa, we're brought a human female home with us!"

Bulma seemed puzzled until she saw the Dragon Ball. Snatching it up, she proclaimed the radar worked and all that. What am I to say about that, it played like normal. She explained what the Dragon Balls were and so on. I decided to step in when Bulma got into what her wish was going to wish for.

"So hand over the Four-Star Dragonball please!" She asked.

"No way! This is all I have left to remember Grandpa." Goku said holding the Dragonball tightly.

Then I realize what a golden opportunity I have because I knew what happen next. I had a perverted idea.

"Goku? Let me talk with the lady. You go out and kill that saber tooth that's been annoying us." I said to him.

He nodded giving me the ball and dashing out Power Pole in hand. Bulma asked if I was going to hand it over.

"Nope." I responded taking a chair seating backwards on it.

Bulma scanned my face and looked up and down. Now I was between Goku and Bulma's height, and I was two years older than Goku. She felt a more mature air off of me.

"Oh, I get it. You naughty boy! You want something in exchange." She said as I grew a smirk.

I was going to milk this for as much as I could get. This was going to be worth it and every fan would kill me to be in my position. She came up to me hiking up her dress showing her panties and offering for me to touch them. I couldn't help but laugh at that. Bulma asked what was so funny.

"Hon, if you expect me to hand this over for touch your firm behind, then just give up now." I said to her getting a rise of anger and embarrassment out of her. "You'll have to ante up."

I was enjoying every minute of this, and I was thinking of Vegeta wanting to kill me if he ever found out I did this. But I didn't care, by then; Bulma will be in no way willing to tell him.

Then Bulma surprised me by saying, "Please, give to me! I'll…I'll…show you everything!"

This was a chance to see her naked? Hell yeah!

"Deal! But I have one condition, Goku and I come with you on your quest!" I said to her being quite serious.

I didn't want the timeline to be shattered by my little plan and thankfully Bulma accepted. I told her she might want to hurry because Goku could be on his way. Bulma hurriedly took off her clothes except for her panties baring everything. Her firm body was so supple. Part of me wondered if her chest even grew later down the line. Then again, later research would find they might have gotten smaller later on the series. I'll have to fix that soon enough.

"Well?" She said with a thick blush. "Enjoy your peep show?!"

"So shiny." I said feigning a little innocence. "And I got my look, you can get dressed!"

Bulma got dressed again red-faced from my compliment this time, and Goku returned. I explained basically we were going on a quest with her and she was going to borrow the ball. Bulma seemed smug, and I bet its cause she knows they're going to scatter when they're used. So Goku and I packed for the journey, and I got my BlackTab (that's the thing my parents give me) clipped to my belt. My outfit was essentially a black and red version of Roshi's Turtle uniform except the symbol had the kanji for "Black". I got my duffel bag slung on my back and Bulma eyed the BlackTab.

* * *

Bulma had immediately asked about the device to which Ace shrugged it off as something his parents gave him. Bulma takes out her Capsule #9 motorcycle to which Goku was adamantly claiming its magic. Ace backhanded Goku for that.

"I'm afraid I don't have space for both of you." She said to them.

"No need, I got my own ride." Ace remarked using his BlackTab to spawn his own custom capsule.

"I've never seen that kind of capsule before." Bulma said snatching the capsule from Ace.

She was looking it over wondering if it was made by Capsule Corp., but Ace took it back point he built it himself. Ace clicked and throws the capsule to unveil a futuristic, high-tech red racing bike of unspecified make and model (think Shotaro Kanaeda's bike from AKIRA). Bulma was drooling at the sight of it, and Ace had a thick smirk.

"Like what you see?" He remarked getting on his bike.

Bulma said nothing and kept drooling. You often forgot Bulma does machines and stuff like this would really interest her. Goku thought Ace could do magic, but one again got backhanded for it. And soon a grand journey would begin for the trio, as they raced off leaving Gohan's hut in the distance. Ace kept showing off what his bike could do leaving Bulma and Goku in the dust at first.

"Sorry Bulma, but it looks you can't keep up!" Ace said letting the wind go through his hair.

He would eat those words as Bulma caught up with him with a knowing smirk on her face.

"My bike might not be so fancy, but I can assure you its fast!" Bulma said confidently as the two came to a stop.

"Why don't you put your money where your mouth is? There's a hill up ahead, first bike over that hill win. Loser gives up their bike." Ace said revving his. "Or you don't get the balls for it?"

"Oh, I got the balls, all right!" Bulma said determined. "You're on!"

"Well then prepare to hand over your bike, futa girl!" Ace said speeding off leaving Bulma.

Bulma pondered on "futa girl" only to realize what it meant, blushed angrily, speed off with Goku to catch up with Ace.

"Ace! You little deviant!" Bulma yelled as Goku held her by her chest for dear life.

Goku had no idea but he squeezed Bulma's chest even tighter to hold on. Bulma would complain, but she was a little too focused on getting Ace.

* * *

I had already jumped the hill and pulled over to the side just waiting for Bulma. By now, her anger had probably made her not notice the hill was huge. Heck, I had enough time to connect my earbud and listen to some tunes. Too bad, I only got through one song before Bulma and Goku come crashing down. Unlike canon where the bike's fine, this time it wasn't so hot. The bike was damaged and Goku was cheering for her to do it again.

"Oh my gosh, I nearly got us killed…I should have been more careful." She said still shaken up before turning to Goku. "Goku, could you get your hands off me, please?"

Goku released his hand as I chuckled. I pointed out that I won, and Bulma seemed pretty steamed. However, she was overcome with a feeling to use the bathroom.

"You two wait, I need a pitstop." She remarked covering her mouth in embarrassment.

"Ok, I'll come with." Goku said about to get off Bulma's bike.

"No! You wait here!" She screamed running for a nearby rock to crowd behind. "Don't you know what a pitstop is?"

"Bulma, of course, he doesn't know. We live in the woods, dummy!" I pointed up.

"It means I need to pee!" Bulma screeched getting behind the rock.

I started walking to her and Goku asked why. I pointed she'll be screaming for us in a few seconds. Sure enough, she was screaming. Goku and I hurriedly rush to find Bulma in the grips of a pterodactyl with her underwear down to her ankles. The look on that pterodactyl's face seemed to imply he wanted to do more than eat her.

"Who are you? A friend of…." Goku said before I cut him off saying, "Drop the girl!"

"No way! This one's mine and I'm going to enjoy every moment of eating her." The pterodactyl remarked even licking the poor girl's face. "And you two can't fly, so bye!"

It took off with a screaming Bulma in tow, and we watched both powerless to do anything. Or so you thought. Goku and I had to use my bike to catch up. Bulma screamed for us to her and seeing what would happen next, I had to sacrifice my badass bike. Overclocking the nitrous oxide, I blasted had used my bike to blast us into air. Goku and I leapt off. I had to watch my precious bike I spent years building on Earth Prime crash into the ground, and I was highly pissed. I grabbed into its wing and was choking the pterodactyl.

"You asshole! That bike was precious to me! I'll kill you!" I yelled choking the life out of it.

And then Goku smashed it right on the head with his Power Pole nearly breaking my face and breaking the pterodactyl's skull. Thankfully, I got off just in time. Bulma was saved by Goku and I laughed at her misfortune at her pissing herself.

"It's not funny, you asshole!" Bulma bellowed.

I kept laughing until I hit the dirt and broke several bones. I know I can heal from injuries thanks to an unknown species dealie, but it didn't stop me from screaming in absolute pain. We were truly off to a great start!


	3. An Anime Fan's Wet Dream

Chapter 3: An Anime Fan's Wet Dream

* * *

(A/N: Prepare for a bit of a lemon. I must admit that it is weird to write this now. This thing was started on February 4, 2016. Making parts of this predating Steven Universe Blackthorned.)

* * *

So here I was having to wheel by damaged bike along the road keeping with Bulma and Goku on her spare motorcycle. I was pissed at my bike being damaged, but at least I could abuse the BlackTab to fix it. We wind up stopping at the spot where Bulma would spawn her House Capsule. I really wanted to crash for a bit and I so glad to be able to store the bike in the house's garage. I could always fix it later. I was wondering how things would play out while I'm here.

Ace shouldn't have thought that. Bulma took a whiff and caught a horrid smell. Her nose wrinkled and the stench made her want to gag.

"You two reek!" She said holding her nose. "You two need a bath."

Ace had not reeked, but Goku was rancid. Goku would be taken by Bulma to be bathed which there was little difference can the canon scenario. Ace had decided to use this time to work on the bike which he has christened as "Kageyama". He had no that he had altered the universe to be a bit more adult than he realized.

I was a bit of mess with the stains and sweat on my body and face. With the parts I can spawn with the BlackTab, it made things easier to fix and even upgrade Kageyama. I was returning it to it's capsule when Bulma entered the garage. Of course, she was wearing her tank top and beige cargo pants.

"All right, look Ace. Apparently, the capsule house is low on bathwater so…we'll have share a bath." She said to me blushing like mad.

I dropped my wrench and somewhere out there a million fanboys wanted to be in my place. The chorus was ringing in my head, but I was emotionless. I merely nodded and she dragged me into the bathroom. However, I had forgotten one thing. You see, time travel is not perfect. It can screw you up pretty bad. In my case, most would kill for but it was just embarrassing. When I was sent out into the past, I discovered one part of my body hadn't de-aged. So back then, I had the tool of my adult self as a kid. Now what's make this embarrassing? Well I grew with alien puberty on me, and now I'm pretty much packing heat most teenagers wish they had. So while Goku stood at 4'3'' now, I stood at 4'4''. The moment I got off my pants, Bulma wound up wide-eyed.

"Ace, how...old are you?" She asked me awkward.

Ironic, that Goku thought he was fourteen when I'm actually fourteen. Ah, poor innocent Goku.

"Fourteen…why?" I said.

I swear I heard her mumble under something that's a good thing being close in age to her. I was just glad I had mental control to ensure my flagpole wouldn't rise. However, I had a real bad feeling that mental control was going out of the window. I desperately kept myself contained as Bulma took off her clothes. We were in the bath tub and I was always washing myself. I had no idea that Bulma had a devious plan.

* * *

Bulma was hatching a plan within her mind. Seeing him flaccid had made her annoyed. She thought of herself as the Most Beautiful Woman in all of West City. And he's seen her naked more times than her previous boyfriends and no reaction! It pissed her off.

"He asked me to strip back there and little reaction! Now he's in a bath with me and nothing. From the way he looks, he is interested in women. Guess, I'll have to play hardball." Bulma thought as a devious smile.

Ace was innocently scrubbing his hair when Bulma came from behind with her chest squishing about his back. His eyes had widened as Bulma whispered in his ear.

"How about I wash your back?" Bulma whispered.

Ace's brain was bugging out, but a voice inside his head sounding oddly like his older self screaming, **"SCREW YAMCHA, TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS!"**

Oh, how Ace wanted to. His mental control crumbled and he "stood" attentively. Bulma was smug that it worked, surprised at his length, and wondering on how to mess with him. Ace was in a bit of pain. Being sent back like that did screw up his body. For one thing, he didn't really have enough blood in his young body to maintain it. So, he was evident pain but his damned Endurion genes kept it up. Bulma noted he was twitching a bit.

"So you are interested? It's too bad, you're not a bit older." Bulma said with a chuckle. "But how about I help you out?"

That inner voice screamed, **"SAY YES! It's Bulma freaking Briefs. It's an anime fan's wet dream!"**

Ace could have refused, but then he thought about it. Then he concluded. He weakly nodded to Bulma. He ended up in middle of receiving a paizuri from Bulma. Ace had a look of happy drunk.

"This is paradise…" He said weakly as Bulma's chest had went up and down on his member.

"Humph, this is between you and me. You'll be a dead man if you tell a soul." Bulma sternly warned.

"Who…who'd believe me?" He said a bit of laughter.

Bulma's breasts provided the sweet relief he needed. Ace was a virgin after all and he was one to eschew self-pleasure being more interested in fighting back on Earth Prime. Now he was fully realizing the opportunities he had. Of course, he knew this already but this cemented it.

"Bulma, I'm gonna…gonna…" Ace say before finally having his first orgasm.

The stream, no fire hose of spunk missed Bulma by a hair and splattered all over the wall behind Bulma leaving a visible crack there due to the force of it.

* * *

I sunk back in the water just relived that was out of me. Bulma wasn't pleased and tossed me out of the bathroom screaming I should have better self-control. Goku looked at me asking what was that about and I shrugged it off. Getting dressed, I have a set and took out a manga out. Specifically, One Piece. So, with more canon stuff going on, Goku ran out to hunt. Now I would help him, but I rather not.

* * *

Little did young Ace knew he was being watched, his warping didn't go unnoticed. However, the only reason Ace wasn't be splattered across the universe was because he was providing…entertainment.

* * *

 **(A/N: Who's watching Ace? Leave your guesses! And because it's a late Christmas post, you get a double post!)**


	4. No Balls, But Plenty of Blood and Guts

Chapter 4: No Balls, But Plenty of Blood and Guts

* * *

(A/N: I'm not going to include the famous No Balls scene mostly because it's a moment too scared to violate with my writing, so this starts right after it.)

* * *

 _ **-(After Goku discovered the most important thing about women, it had annoyed a certain warper out of slumber.)-**_

"You will two can it, I want to sleep!" I said putting a pillow over my head.

"No balls!" Goku said frightened.

My solution was smash a frying pan over Goku's head to shut him up for a bit. Yeah, it was cruel but he'll get stronger from it. Besides, he'll thank me later. A few hours, we all break up for breakfast. We were going back on the road for the balls. However, I knew Bulma would do her hair so I was already outside with Goku hoisting rocks and and whatnot. So Goku found Turtle, and man was I glad to see him.

"Whoa! Put me down, I'm not a rock." He said sweating nervously.

Goku put him down and we all talk for a bit. Of course, I already knew Turtle was out gathering mushrooms when he got lost and could not find his way back to the sea for a whole year. I call out Bulma and she got the sea water. So Goku hoist him on his back determined to head for the ocean.

"Hey! Wait, the ocean is 120 kilometers from here. We can't do this now. I only have a month of summer break." Bulma whined.

"Wait, I thought it was 100 miles." I said to myself before I turn to Bulma, "For one minute, could you show some kindness? He's lost and needs help."

Goku already took off without us and I smirked as I snagged by BlackTab and my backpack. Getting on my motorcycle, I jet after them.

"Later Bulma, see if you can make nice with hungry or horny dinosaurs!" I yelled continuing to follow Goku.

Now Bulma didn't get what he went by "horny dinosaurs", until she realized she was all alone with the two people who could fight are miles away. Her face went red as she took for her motorcycle to ride after them.

"Ace, you little jackass, wait up!" Bulma said speeding after our "heroes".

Soon, all four of them were on their way to the ocean but an opponent would soon at the way stopping the lot dead in their tracks. An anthropomorphic bear who was watching them had came out of hiding to face them. He was a large one wearing the armor of the **Kuma Menercary Clan** (which is basically Chinese armor from the Ming and Qing Dynasties) wielding a mighty Chinese broadsword which he lovingly called "Illusive Azure*". This bandit was known as **Kuma Mercenary**

 **Rikanto**. Or as Ace knew him as…

* * *

Bear Thief. I completely forgot about this waste of ink and paper. This guy was complete joke and I wasn't even scared. Considering all the people in Dragon Ball alone, he was low on the pecking order. Hell, I showed no fear looking at his dumb face. Goku nailed this guy with one punch in the anime, and a combo in the manga. So I decided that I would going to take this one, because I was itching to fight someone. And he was unimportant enough for me to beat up.

"What do you want, Smokey? Shouldn't you be shirtless and telling people to put out fires?" I said sarcastically.

"I…don't get it. Either way, I'm here for the turtle. Tonight, I want to dine on turtle soup. So hand him and the girl over, and I won't kill you." He said with a cruel smirk.

"No. I don't want to give you the turtle." Goku said defiantly.

"Goku! Ace! Quit being stupid! He's huge." Bulma said terrified of him.

I knew she was terrified of what he would do to her. Oh right, she forgot her guns back at the capsule house.

What a whine. I put down the kickstand to Kageyama, and I get off cracking my knuckles.

"Goku, I know you want to fight this ass. But do you mind if I take him on instead? You'd beat him easily." I said with a smirk on my face.

"All right, Ace. I'll watch the turtle and Bulma." Goku said. "I'll finally get to see you fight all out."

"Ace! Don't do it, he's armed with that s…" Bulma said before I face you.

"Bulma, if I beat him, you will owe me a favor. No questions asked." I said before facing the bandit. "And as for you, bring it because I'm not giving you a damn thing."

It's then I noticed a light purple glint in his scarred eye for a second before readied to attack. Either someone's screwing with this universe or I'm seeing things. He swung his sword and I got out of the way swiftly. He was a lot faster than I thought he'd be. It was then that my BlackTab, which was still strapped to my side, started playing, strangely enough, Fierce Battle from Metal Slug 5. Don't know why, but it only seemed to make this more intense. Backflipping out of his range, Bear Thief let loose a shockwave by slamming his sword into the sword. That's when I noticed his sword glowing purple and he released an energy attack through his sword. I tried to deflect it, and I learned my first lesson in living in this world. Don't be cocky until I could back it up. I was sent crashing into the dirt.

"Ace!" Goku said about to set the turtle down to fight him.

"No! He's mine!" I said scrambling up to my feet.

No more game! I charged at him and he swung his sword at me once again. Leaping over his attack, I let him talk to my left foot as it collided with his skull. Seeing the blood spew out made it oh so sweet a sight. The big bear went down on the ground, and my injuries slowly begin to heal. The music cut out on my BlackTab.

* * *

"Ace, you did it!" Goku said excitedly.

Ace had expected this to be over, and our three heroes were readying to go on their merry way. But it wasn't over yet.

"Boss-sama!" A female voice cried out.

Ace was confused and the four surprised with two new people entered the scene. A woman with Rapunzel length orange hair, bluish skin, blue eyes, and pointed ears had came along along with an amphibian-like warrior. Both were armor similar to Ritanko. In this timeline, Ritanko had allies. The demon witch **Mamba** and The demon frog warrior **Susha**. The reason why Ace didn't recognize them was because they were found a certain special Ace wanted to forget. Mamba attended to Ritanko shaking him awake. Ace had cracked the boar's skull and pretty much jacked up his scarred eye worse.

"Urggh…Mamba, Susha, you're here." He said slowly staggering to his feet. "Seems this punk, Ace, here has some fight in him."

"Don't move, we'll deal with them." She said before turning to Ace and Goku. "I hope you punks are going to leave now before I'm going to kill you and devour your meat off your corpses."

"If that's the case, I'll just have to kick ass then. Bulma, watch Urigame. Goku, take this bitch on. The frog one's mine." Ace said cracking his knuckles.

Goku put Turtle down, and he scurried behind Bulma. Goku walked up to take a fighting stance.

"Humph, you just got lucky. You won't be this time." Susha said liquefying himself into a puddle.

-Ace vs. Susha-

Ace looked at the frog warrior at first thinking that is going to a tough fight, then he realized that Susha being a liquid made him water. Ace contemplated on how to fight him while dodging his strikes.

"I could boil him with fire, but I'm unsure of the fire technique will even work. The ice is a no go until I train some more. I could fry it with electricity though." Ace said.

To Ace, he thought it was odd he could use electricity easily and seemed to be immune to it. He didn't know that it was his mixed blood giving him that. At the moment, he just found it convenient.

"I don't know if the universe is begging me to try out making my own technique, but I won't look in a gift horse in the mouth." Ace said to himself.

"See, boy. It's useless to fight me because all can do is dodge me!" Susha bragged.

Ace focused an amount of ki into his left hand in tandem with charging a bit of his own bio-electricity into it.

"Supākutatchi (Sparking Touch)!" Ace said slamming him palm down on the puddle electrocuting Susha.

Susha screamed in agony as his inside were fried due to them being liquid. To everyone (except Goku), the puddle exploded with blood, gut, and pieces of Susha's armor flying everywhere. Ace wasn't shocked but numb. Bulma was horrified, but she was glad it was one less person to deal with.

"Susha, no! You killed my closest friend you…." Mamba said before getting her skull cracked by a swing of Goku's Power Pole.

Said blow send her flying up until she was a mere twinkle in the sky. Ritanko was now alone once again, but Ace wasn't going to let him live this time. Ace bolted toward Ritanko sliding under the bear's sword strike and delivering a rising double kick up to the bear's jaw. As Ritanko stumbled backwards, Ace focused all his ki and bio-electricity into his whole hand.

"Shi no denki-tekina ejji (Electrical Edge of Death)!" Ace yelled slamming his fist through Ritanko's armor and hitting his flesh.

The poor bear had to suffer the fierce blow and having his inside electrocuted. It didn't help his Ace's hand was soaked Susha's guts and blood. The boars blood-curdling screams were music to Ace's ears. After about twenty agonizing seconds for bear, Ace pulled out.

"The Kuma Mercernary Clan…will….have….your head for this..gahh!" Ritanko said falling over to the dirt dead.

His body smoked and burnt from being electrocuted, Ace casually took up Ritanko's Azure Dragon sword which would have fried Ace if he wasn't immune to electricity.

"That was rough, Goku." Ace said a sigh of relief.

"Yeah, that old witch was tough too. She kept trying to strangle me with her hair." Goku said dusting himself off.

"Well they wouldn't be a threat anymore, and I got a new sword. A sword like this should get a name." Ace said raising the sword in the air.

* * *

I was trying to think of a badass name for this sword. My brothers would come up names for their weapons. I was thinking Dragon Soul or Death's Razor, but something tells me those names were taken. I noticed the spark of electricity off the sword and I had a name in mind.

"I got it! I'll call it Rakurai." I said looking up at it.

"That's a nice name for a sword." Goku said.

"Calling your sword a thunderbolt, Ace? Fine, suits you I guess." Bulma said.

I had Bulma and Goku go on ahead with Turtle to the ocean, because I had something I needed to do. My BlackTab got the results of who those two clowns and I was shocked to know that those rejects from that bastard timeline here.

"Well I hope I won't see **Lord Yao**. But, that might not be a bad thing. Someone that I can fight is a bonus." I said to myself. "Now, for you Bear Thief."

I stabbed it several times with Rakurai mostly to ensure he's dead and to leave that bitch Mamba (if she lives) with no way to fix him. Afterwards, I hop back on Kageyama and ride off to the beach to catch up. I arrive to find Turtle already gone and Goku and Bulma playing in the water. Stabbing the sword into the stab, I joined them. I need a bit of piece of fun, plus to get the bloodstains off of me. Soon enough, Master Roshi arrived. I introduced myself, but stayed silent while canon went on. Goku got the Flying Nimbus, and then we got to the infamous scene.

Turtle berated Roshi for asking such a dishonorable request talking about code and so forth, but Ace shushed him. Bulma had was having second thoughts, so I gave her a reassuring look. I did have my BlackTab on record for this. Why? I can say I witnessed it, and material to laugh at later. I did realize something…Bulma could really use a shave. I kept recording the whole glorious scene. In the end, I put away by BlackTab, and thanks Roshi for gifting Goku.

"Eh…wait, Master Roshi. Ace helped in the fight as well, and as much should be rewarded as well." Turtle said.

"Oh right. Sorry, I don't really have anything of value. But Turtle did mention you having some good fighting skills. So how about a chance to train under me?" Roshi said scratching the back of his hand.

I was already planning to go to him with Goku anyway, but I accept. I did point out that I had an obligation with the "hot young scientist" and I had to handle it.

"Oh, I see. Well then, take your time. When you're done, do come by my island." Roshi said handing me the address which I didn't really need.

We said our goodbyes and we were on our way back.

"I can't believe I had to flash that old guy." Bulma bemoaned.

"Come on, Bulma. It could have been worse, trust me. Ero-senin could have easily asked for sex or worse." I pointed out.

 **Considering the amount of doujins, this was both ironic and true.**

" _Ero-sen'nin_?" Bulma said before breaking out into laughter. "Ok, now I am going to call him that if we meet again."

* * *

Despite all that, it was still morning as they returned to the capsule house. Ace now carried Rakurai on his right side with his BlackTab now on his left side. Bulma entered the capsule home to change only to scream in terror that she had no panties on.

"The old man saw everything!" Bulma said horrified forgetting about Ace for the moment.

Of course, Goku innocently told her that he took them off while she was sleeping. Ace rushed inside and told Goku to wait outside. Ace told in a machine gun toting Bulma's way.

"Bulma, I know you're mad, but you shouldn't shoot him. One of my regrets was not teaching him sex ed. He truly doesn't know better." Ace said trying to calm her down.

"So it's your fault, then!" Bulma said firing on Ace. "You asshole!"

To Bulma's disappointment, this didn't hurt Ace at all and he rolled his eyes as she emptied the clip of bullets on him.

"Whatever. Let's just pack up and get on Goku's cloud." She said putting on a new outfit.

"Bulma, you can't even get on the cloud. You need to be pure-hearted, and you are not." Ace remarked.

"Oh yeah, I am pure of heart! I'd bet on it." Bulma said.

Bulma pulled the trigger for Ace's benefit. Ace betted Bulma she couldn't get the cloud. Bulma went out and tried to get on the Nimbus only to fall face on her face.

"I guess you're not pure enough to ride the Kinto'un, Bulma!" Goku said innocently only for Goku to be punched off the cloud by Bulma.

"I guess being too beautiful is a crime." Bulma said.

"Say that to Boa Hancock, Chun-Li, and Lana Kane. Bet they deck you for that." Ace said being a sarcastic jerk about it.

"Piss off! I bet you can't even get on the damn thing." Bulma said angrily.

Ace pointed out that he knows this, but shoots back with that he didn't boasted he was pure. Bulma gritted her teeth.

"And I won the bet, and I know what I…" Ace said before dragged inside the capsule house by an angry Bulma.

"Girls are certainly strange." Goku said in thought.

Bulma threw Ace on the bed looking at him clearly flustered.

"So what will it be?" Bulma asked arms crossed. "And no, I am not going to swallow."

Ace started to laugh and pointed out that sexual stuff wasn't what he wanted yet. He told her he had other plans in mind.

"Are you sure you don't want to fool around a little?" Bulma said nervously.

* * *

Two minutes later, I was outside waiting with Goku. What did I do to Bulma? Well, I decided to give her a makeover because she was our Ms. Fanservice. I had Bulma dress up as Boa Hancock, and Bulma unwillingly came out of the house to de-capsulize it. However, I wasn't a complete jerk and modified it. The top wasn't as revealing as Boa's with an added white tube top, and sarong wasn't that loose. She also wore sneakers, but I had her wear the snake earrings and even styled her hair similarly.

"Ace, thanks for…not making this outfit so bad." Bulma said with a thin blush.

"No problem. I'm not a heartless asshole." I said getting on Kageyama with my duffel bag on my back and my gear on my side.

"Well you're still a perv, but one who can do hair. Where did you learn to do that?" She said getting her radar out and getting on her motorcycle.

"My mother had trained me so she could have someone to do hair. My dad wasn't really good with that." I said calmly.

"Wait, your mom? I thought you were an orphan like Goku." Bulma said to me confused.

"I didn't say I was." I said starting up Kageyama. "But it doesn't matter at the moment, where's the next ball?"

"Well it seems to be in that direction." Bulma said pointing East.

"There's a village in that direction. It'll take us about two to three days to get there. I think it's Aru Village or something like that." I said taking off.

Bulma and Goku follow along and we were all off to continue the adventure. I knew she was going to change clothes by the time we get there, but I had a plan for it. Heh…

* * *

(A/N: Easily, my favorite chapter to write. I mixed element of manga and the anime well in this one. One thing I kept from the manga was not having Pilaf appear yet. Just assume his shenanigans with his minons is off-screen. Also, this chapter is littered with references, and the ones in bold you'll have to look up.)

* * *

 _-Ace's Special Attacks-_

 _(A/N: This list is for the attacks that Ace has created on his own, or modified from previous ones to create new ones. After every chapter, this will be posted underneath each chapter to describe each one if I create any new attacks for Ace.)_

 _Supakutatchi (Sparking Touch) - An attack focusing on electrocuting a foe by focusing ki in tandem with one's bio-electricity into one hand. (Can be used as a palm strike or punch)_

 _Shi no denki-tekina ejji (Electrical Edge of Death) - Ace's version of the Heavy Impact. There two versions to this attack, the lethal one that can kill an opponent and the restrained one which is mean to severly injure an opponent._


	5. Oolong the Not-So-Terrible

**Chapter 5: Oolong's The Not So Terrible**

 **(A/N: Oolong's debut is going to be rather short.)**

* * *

Riding into the empty Aru Village, our "heroes" found themselves in a seemingly deserted ghost town. Bulma got off her motorcycle to find around, and she was in another outfit that Ace had given her. Apparently, most of her clothes feel into a pile of mud thanks to Goku and Ace's practicing their kata leaving her reliant on Ace. Thankfully, Ace was still not a complete jackass about it. Bulma was now in a bright red dress with low-cut straps, white cuff socks, and white gym shoes. The dress was a bit too low cut for Bulma's taste, but Ace had given her a scarlet jacket reaching her abdomen with the Capsule Corporation logo on the right sleeve. Bulma would never admit it, but she liked the jacket.

"Note to self, make one like this when I go home. But I want it in indigo." Bulma said in her thoughts.

"It's quiet…too quiet." Ace said deliberately making a movie reference.

"Really, Ace?" Bulma said to him annoyed.

"Where is everyone? This pie is still warm, so someone has to be here." Goku said taking the pie off the windowsill of the one of the homes. "Well if no one's here, I guess I won't waste it.

Goku ate the pie much to Bulma's ever growing annoyance and Ace's amusement. The trio wondered through the empty village until Goku finally decided to open a door to one of the house and got an axe to the head for his naviete. The axe shattered into a million pieces, and the pain on the Goku's head was more blunt force trauma.

"Damn it!" Ace said leaping in front of Goku with his sword in hand.

Bulma had to check on the bump on Goku's head which was rather bulbous. The attacker, who just a mere man backed away in fear.

"Oh no, he's not dead….and he's multiple!" He said backing up. "Please don't take Pochawompa. Not my innocent daughter!"

"First off, we're not Oolong dumbass, and you should be lucky my bro here is tough enough to survive that attack." Ace said angrily before calming down. "You're a Mr. Sherman Priest, right?"

He nodded to confirm that was his name.

"I'm Ace. We have come to your village to defeat Oolong and save your village from his terror." Ace said sheathing his sword. "At a price."

"Name it, we'll do anything." Pochawompa said getting in front of him.

Bulma dragged Ace outside a good distance to talk about what he just said. Pochawompa took to tending the bump on Goku's head introducing herself to him. Goku still checked if she was girl with a pat-pat though. Ace would have taught him better, but to Ace, this was too funny.

* * *

Bulma yelled at me firstly for saying we'd help them out. I retorted that someone in his village must have the Dragon Ball, and it'd be an easy way to get it. Bulma was worried about our safety, but I pointed out that I have a plan. I lied to Bulma that I read up on criminal elements. Easy way for me not to reveal that I already knew things were happening

"Just trust me on this, and follow my lead." I said to her calmly.

"Well all right, fine." Bulma remarked still not fully trusting me.

So, I had the town gather at the Priest's home to discuss a deal. I named my price, the Six Star Dragon Ball, mentioning that our scientist (Bulma) was tracking them. Grandma Paozu stepped out the crowd holding the jewel.

"While this has been in my family for generations, I suppose I can part with it if it means no more of that demon." She said. "You have a deal."

"I get to fight this Oolong guy, Ace." Goku said determined to get into the fray.

I nodded, but one of the villager's father asked how I going to catch Oolong.

"Simple. I'm going to use bait by giving him a better prize than Pochawompa." I said to the villagers. "I get why Oolong wants her. She's pure, and thus can be made submissive. However, he'll forget her when I put out some bait."

Bulma turned to look at me and realized I was going to use her as bait. Reluctantly, she agreed. To the villagers hid back in their homes, leaving just us three again.

"Bulma, I know this is risky, but don't fear anything. Just seduce him and before he'll even touch you, I'll have myself and Goku rush him." I said trying to reassuringly. "Unless you have a better plan."

Bulma suggested the plan she would have used in canon, but I pointed out that it's too easy for that to backfire. I also pointed that he would be more distracted with her.

"Bulma, I won't let him so much as touch you." I said. "But when he comes ask Oolong to change into more alluring form. Just say it."

Bulma nodded and we set into the motion our plan. Bulma stood there, and Oolong came in his oni form exactly like in canon. Now Bulma just had to not screw this part up.

* * *

Ace and Goku hid on different sides of the villages with Goku waiting for the signal to jump out with Ace. Bulma was shaking with fear, but took a gulp to swallow her fear.

"You must be Oolong…" Bulma said still shaking.

"And who might you be?" Oolong asked in deep oni voice.

Oolong wasn't going to get another word out of Bulma before she was too shaken to speak. Ace was inwardly cursing good green Kami for Bulma freezing up.

"I should change out of this form for something a bit more approachable." Oolong said changing forms.

Gone was the oni, and in entered the handsome man form. Bulma went from scared and have hearts in her eyes for him. Ace groaned, but was glad this was going along well.

"Hello stranger, my name's Bulma." She said with hearts in her eyes. "And trust me, you won't need Pocawatha…I mean Pocawhompa."

"And why's that?" Oolong said arms crossed.

That jacket she wore to cover up the low cut was tossed off like it was on flames as said, "That's because why have a pure little girl when you can have a full woman with perky 34-Cs."

"Damn it, go down!" Ace said quietly a bit aroused by Bulma saying those words. "I swear, Oolong, you won't get the pleasure of feeling them!"

"With a girl like that, I'd be set for life!" Oolong said in his thoughts with glee going into a gleeful fantasy of groping a pair of breasts. "Besides, I'll get Pocawatha after."

Before he could actually touch Bulma who will more than willing to let him, Ace jumped out of hiding screaming, "Goku! It's go time!"

"All right!" Goku said jumping out from the right.

"Oolong, your time is up!" Ace said with Rakurai in hand.

"It's been five minutes already! I'm out of here!" Oolong said fleeing in fear.

Ace had to do a double take before realizing what he said, and Goku chased after Oolong. Now Ace had to deal with the wrath of Bulma.

* * *

Bulma had me by the throat infuriated with me scaring off Oolong saying she wanted him to touch her. I took a deep breath to calm myself.

"You do know, that's he a shapeshifter, right? And that's not even his real form!" I said getting her to release me. "But I do know his real form and have a picture."

Bulma was piqued by this, so I merely show her his real form on my BlackTab which Bulma fuming steam.

"And to insult to injury, he's underage. Per my sources, he's about…what…nine?" I said to her.

Bulma kneeled over to throw up and went into complete rage. I swear she had a trace of ki glowing off her sending screams and curses so foul that the drunkest sailor would be in shock to hear.

"Bulma, calm down. I don't think you can gather the balls if you blow a blood vessel." I said spawned a cold beer to give to Bulma.

She took and drank it before calming down. Goku came back telling us he lost the guy, but met a pig. I had calm Bulma before she flipped. I assured her that I would personally beat him up with Goku, and that prevented her manic attack. So, the next day, and I, of course, provided something for Bulma to wear. At this point, I'm surprised that she didn't question my BlackTab.

* * *

It had been just an hour for our heroes, and Bulma was ready to watch a beating. She even had popcorn in a bucket sitting on a lawn chair. She didn't care about the outfit Ace gave her some blue-black-and-white sports bra and tights set with black biker gloves, upper arm bands and white socks. Simply, Ace raided Sonya Blade's closet and Bulma didn't question it. Ace and Goku were waiting in the middle of town, with Pocawhompa (or Pocawatha if you're a Funi dub fan) behind them. The whole town watched from inside the Priest home.

"He'll be here. Ready yourself." Ace said getting up from his meditative stance.

"Right." Goku remarked.

Oolong returned in his giant robot form with a bowl of wonton soup in hand.

"Hand over the girl or I will dip you in the so.." Oolong said before Ace threw Rakurai at the bowl knocking it out of his hand.

"You do realize that we are skilled in karate and kung fu, right?" Ace said. "And I am personally going to see to it, that I'll kung fuck you up!"

"That so, huh?" Oolong said. "Then I will…gurrkk!"

Goku had slammed his fist into Oolong's stomach send him crashing through a house.

"Same here, even though I don't get what Ace just said." Goku said ready for more combat.

Oolong realized he was utterly screwed at the moment. This kid punched him through a house. He shuddered with fear in his eyes.

"I might be able to shapeshift, but these guys are the real deal!" He said before changing forms into a bat. "And I'm out of here!"

Batlong took off with Goku on the chase with his Kinto'un in hot pursuit. Ace took to his bike, Kageyama to go after them taking Bulma with her on the backseat on them.

"Bulma, hang on! I'm shifting up to high-pursuit mode." Ace said flipping on a switch on the bike.

Kageyama glowed a bright red before the two were blasted off at higher speeds than normal to keep up with Oolong and Goku. Oolong shifted to a speeding rocket just to try and elude but to no avail. Time was up for the pig as he ended up back in his normal pig form falling towards certain death. Of course, Goku had saved him being the good guy that he was. Ace circled back with Bulma seeing the skirmish in the sky.

"Good, he's been caught." Ace said with a smile. "Now, we can get the girls."

* * *

We all returned to Aru Village with Oolong. I had Goku not tie him up, because I had Rakurai to his throat. I insisted I didn't want to kill him, so he willingly lead us to his "shack".

"Those girls must be deathly afraid!" Sarah's father said. "Damn pig!"

"I doubt that." I said. "Considering that the mansion is right in front of the village, they could have walked back anything."

"Mansion?!" The villager before I pointed out the luxurious mansion Oolong.

"You call that a shack?" Goku said looking at the sheer size of it. "How did you get such a big house?"

"It wasn't easy, because I had to rip off a lot of people." He said crossing his arms.

"And you're proud of it?" Goku asked.

I led them on and of course they found their children in the lap of luxury. Hell, Sarah was drinking bourbon and Little Flower had scotch whiskey. Alexi was working out. The odder thing was they looked a hell of a lot older. Heck, Pocawhompa looked older now that I looked at her. Why did I have a shitty feeling about this?

"Oh hey smookums. I hope you got the nail polish I asked for." Alexi said using a nearby towel to wipe the sweat off his face.

Sarah turned to face her parents and said in a snooty tone, "Oh sorry, I would have walked over to see you, but I've been busy."

 ***cough* Bullshit. *cough***

"I would have left, but free booze and all the gifts is a deal too sweat to pass up. Oh, Oolong! We're out of beer." Little Flower said putting down her glass.

"Wait, let me get this straight. You three could have left at any time, and you didn't even to say, "Hey, we're fine!"" Pocawhompa said angrily. "I thought I was going to be tortured!"

The three girls (or I should say young women) shrugged. Jeez, their fathers were pissed. That was our cue to leave. We got our Dragon Ball and we were on our way. Not before saying goodbye to Pocawhompa first!

* * *

(A/N: This one is rather short, mostly because there's not much to change. Plus, I had a real dark joke for ending in mind, but I backed off. It was a bit too far, remnants of it are in there though. If you are curious about said planning joke, you can leave a PM.)


	6. When Yamcha was threatening

**Chapter 6: Yamcha, when we he was actually threatening!**

 **(A/N: Remember when Yamcha was badass and awesome. Yeah, I don't. He is, but when I got fully introduced to this series long ago, Yamcha was already getting his ass beat. This title is ironic.)**

* * *

So here we were on a boat going up a river, and Oolong asked where we going next.

"Oolong, we're not our way to Fry-Pan Mountain or Fire Mountain where the next Dragon Ball is." I said leaning back on the edge of the boat.

"You mean that mountain where the fearsome Ox-King lives? Ace, Bulma, and Goku , you three are nuts!" Oolong said shapeshifting into a fish. "Screw this, I'm outta here!"

He swam away, but I stopped Goku from going after him. I nodded at Bulma, and of course she used a fishing rod with her underwear to get him back. Bulma even gave him the PP Candy which I planned to cure. Most of the rapport between the people was canon stuff so I stayed quiet until the boat shook send all of us into the water. With the boat out of gas, I had the honor of dragging the boat to shore.

"Damn it! My capsules are gone! My shampoo!" She said before turning to Oolong. "You stole them!"

Oolong was still trying to flee and Bulma made the "Squee!" noise sending the poor kid into the bushes to make a painful dump. Bulma began laughing, but I was a tad sorry for Oolong. I still had my BlackTab and my duffel bag so I spawn out of BlackTab a cure to give to Oolong.

"Here Oolong, this should cure the effects of the pill." I said giving him a vial to which he quickly drank.

"Ace, you're a lifesaver!" He said grateful.

Bulma wasn't pleased.

"How am I going to keep him in line, Ace?" She yelled at me.

My response was to hold her by the collar (Even though, I had to call her down to my height.), and cut her a heated glare.

"Might I remind you that you are the oldest in the group and yet you set a shitty example for everyone else. Oolong's a perv, but he didn't deserve to be done dirty like that." I said harshly before releasing. "No need to be a total bitch to him."

* * *

Bulma huffed before realizing she did need to change out of her wet clothes and she didn't have any caspules with clean clothes. She looked over at Ace who was still upset at her for drugging Oolong.

"Hey Ace, you got any clothes for me left?" Bulma asked sweetly. "C'mon, I'll wear whatever you got."

Bulma shouldn't have said that, because the deviant side of Ace was concocting a scheme. However, Ace actually had to think of how far he wanted to go, but he remembered they were in Diablo Desert. So out of his BlackTab, he spawned a blue and purple halter top with a pink shroud and a long white skirt with the top part blue. Even came with gladiator sandals. That's right, Ace had raided Nami's closest this time. Bulma wasn't so happy about the clothes given to her.

"Before you say anything, we are in a desert. Would you rather me give you a sweater to boil in so Oolong won't perv on you? He still would. Besides, that's the last outfit I have in stock." Ace said to Bulma. "So please suck it up."

Bulma sighed to walked off to change into the belly dancer outfit. Ace was able to spawn outfits for everyone before his BlackTab hit low battery. Oolong and Goku virtually had their exact clothes. Ace on the other hand was a tad different. He wore black gi like one of his younger brother's. The outfit Ace now wore was similar to the Turtle school uniform. However, it was black with blue linings. The kanji in the front was " **耐久** " (Taikyū) meaning endurance and on the back was " **黒** " (Kuro) meaning black. He had no idea that the design he selected was one of his younger brother's creations, but didn't dwell on it. When Bulma returned to the group, the Dragon Ball Gang started walking through the hot and humid desert. Ace didn't complain about this. He lived on an island near the equator back on Earth Prime.

"It's so hot!" Oolong said bitterly. "You just had to lose your capsules, Bulma."

"Eat bacon, you pig!" Bulma screeched at him.

"Well you two jackasses, shut up!" Ace yelled annoyed at their bickering.

He casually pulled out a can of soda out of his duffel bag to everyone's shock and started drinking it. Bulma asked where did he get that and if he had more of those. Ace nodded and give everyone a soda admitted he got them out of Oolong's mansion.

"I had snagged some stuff from your mansion, Oolong. I'm sorry about that, but I had a feeling I'd need it more." Ace remarked.

Bulma still went into her temper tantrum like a brat over not having her capsules to wash her hair, watch TV, and so forth. Only after she started to bitch about walking in the desert, did Ace chop her neck knocking her unconscious.

"Kami, I couldn't wait for heat exhaustion to get her to shut up." He said dragging her into the shade.

Unbeknownst to everyone (except Ace), they were being watched by blue floating cat through a telephone. Of course, Ace knew it was Pu'ar and Yamcha coming for them.

* * *

"Look alive, guys. We got company!" I said unsheathing my sword.

"Right!" Goku said getting his Power Pole ready.

"Oh great!" Oolong said getting behind us.

Right on cue, Yamcha and Pu'ar show up. Now one thing has always bugged me, is Pu'ar a guy or a girl? Well I guess I could find out now.

"Well well, it's Yamcha the Desert Bandit." I remarked. "What an honor for you to come."

"My reputation precedes me. I am the Desert Bandit. I normally don't prey on children. But you must know that if you want to leave here alive, you'll hand over your money and your capsules to me and Pu'ar now." Yamcha said sounding rather threatening.

"Pu'ar! Cry-baby Pu'ar?" Oolong said sweating harder.

"And if it isn't the perverted pig, Oolong. How awful it is to see you again." Pu'ar said. "You look as greasy as always."

"Says the androgynous pussy!" Oolong barked.

"Wait, hold on! Are you guy or a girl?!" Ace screamed confused.

"I'm a man, damn it!" Pu'ar screamed. "Bully! Weirdo!"

* * *

 **((A/N: Pu'ar was a guy in the manga, but they made him female in the Funi dub which I don't fully understand why. I don't know if they changed it back in Kai, so I'm going with the manga here on this gender deal.))**

* * *

"Enough of this. Now hand over your valuables, especially that sword of yours." Yamcha said gesturing to Rakurai.

I did the boldest thing in defiance, I spat on his face.

"It'll be a cold day in hell before I let you get your hands on my sword! You'll have to kill me for it." I said tossing off my duffel bag. "Goku, together!"

"Hai!" Goku said as we both charged at Yamcha.

"You in deep shit now, Cha-cha!" Oolong screamed gaining into the shade next to Bulma.

* * *

 **-Yamcha vs Goku w/Ace-**

Rakurai and Yamcha's sword clashed and clang as they fought with the extra clashes of Goku's Power Pole.

"Impossible, the Nyoi-bō! How do you have something like that?" Yamcha said leaping back.

"Passed down to be by my grandfather." Goku said nailing Yamcha with a punch to the face.

"If he means Gohan, then I can't hold anything back!" Yamcha said thought getting up to ready himself.

Yamcha got into position and Ace could feel the rise in Yamcha. Ace had secretly learned how to sense ki. Ace leapt back watching Yamcha charge after Goku.

"Rōgafūfūken (Wolf Fang Fist)!" Yamcha yelled as he started a combo of clawing and punching Goku.

He then finished with a double palm strike to launch Goku into some giant mushrooms. Goku stammered up hurt, but his hunger was eating at his strength. Ace got in Yamcha's way.

"Seems my friend's a bit winded, so I'll finish it up. Nice technique by the way." Ace said putting his blade back in it's sheath to crack his knuckles.

"My Wolf Fang Fist is unrivaled to none." Yamcha said confidently.

"Well then, I'll just have to copy it and do it better you." Ace said with a wicked smirk. "Supakutatchi! (Sparking Touch)"

Ace's hands were coated his ki and bio-electricity being his first time using it for both hands. He mimicked Yamcha's stance.

" **Supākuburakkukonbo: Ōkami (Sparking Black Combo: Wolf Variant)** " Ace said charging forward.

Ace's punches mimicked Yamcha's blow for blow with added several kicks to Yamcha's stomach and legs. Yamcha was caught off guard by the thought of something delivering his own attack back at him. To finish off the attack, Ace landed a palm strike on Yamcha's left side. A strike to the right side, and Ace leapt up to finish it with a spin kick to Yamcha's face. The bandit was rolling into the dirt. Pu'ar was dumbfounded, but Yamcha got up rather hurt.

"You copied my technique!" Yamcha yelled clearly annoyed.

"No. I made a new variant of my Sparking Black Combo in the style of your attack. It's more of a spiritual successor." Ace remarked.

"You little shi—" Yamcha said before Bulma woke up.

Even though Yamcha wanted to beat the shit out of the cheeky Ace. The sight of women terrified him, and the two got a brief glance at each other. Yamcha fell over and fled with Pu'ar who just finished kicking the crap out of Oolong with shapeshifting.

"Well that's that." Ace said turning to Goku. "You all right, Goku?"

"I'm fine." Goku said dusting himself off. "That was awesome technique you pulled on him. Think you can pass it on to me."

"Fine, fine. But let's get out of this damn heat." Ace said walking into the shade.

Bulma wanted to know who the cute desert bandit was, but Ace rolled his eyes. He wasn't in mood for it and wanted to rest.

* * *

 _-Ace's Special Attacks-_

 _(A/N: This list is for the attacks that Ace has created on his own, or modified from previous ones to create new ones. I'll post this underneath chapters where Ace forms a new technique.)_

 _Supakutatchi (Sparking Touch) - An attack focusing on electrocuting a foe by focusing ki in tandem with one's bio-electricity into one hand. (Can be used as a palm strike or punch)_

 _Shi no denki-tekina ejji (Electrical Edge of Death) - Ace's version of the Heavy Impact. There two versions to this attack, the lethal one that can kill an opponent and the restrained one which is mean to severely injure an opponent._

 _Supākuburakkukonbo (Sparking Black Combo)- A combo style of ki empowered punches or kicks. It's rather basic, but isn't anything to underestimate._

 _Ōkami : The wolf variant of the Sparking Black Combo taking cues from Yamcha's Wolf Fang Fist._


	7. Midnight Intrusion (wLemon)

**Chapter 7: Midnight Intrusion**

 **(A/N: This chapter is going to get a little lemon flavored. You were warned.)**

* * *

It was late, and I was in no mood for sleeping out in the damn cold. I ask Oolong if we could use the capsule and he was willing to oblige us. Out of the capsule, came the British AEC Routemaster double-decker bus or the sweet house-wagon. Bulma went into rant mode demanding why he didn't say he had a dynocap. I come to his defense pointing out we nearly got robbed. We all enter and to me it's like walking on the set of a movie. I toss my duffel bag to the side, and put my sword on the counter. I was glad my BlackTab could easily spawn off because Goku was going to eat out most of the food. Using the BlackTab, I spawn off a dynocap filled with food to which I open to chow down on.

"Jeez, save some of that food for us, will you?" Oolong said watching us eat. "You eat enough to feed me for a month."

"Sorry, but we're starvin' here." I said stuffing more noodles down my mouth.

It was then I saw Bulma already unzipping out of the belly dancer skirt saying she needed to shower.

"There better not be any peepholes!" Bulma said to Oolong.

"Don't worry, Bulma. I'll make sure he says right here." I said leaning back.

"Aw, thanks Ace." Bulma said going ahead to shower.

"Asskisser." Oolong mumbled.

So Oolong asked Goku the deal about the Dragon Balls, and I remembered something. Yamcha was on the other side listening it, but Mai and Shu should be in the front. Grabbing my sword, I go outside and I find them.

They look like they got caught doing something dirty. I unsheathed Rakurai and I had a sneer on my face.

"The easy way is you walk away. The hard way is I use this to cauterize your legs off." I said darkly.

Now I was bluffing. Mostly because thanks to Super, I can't kill those idiots. Of course, being that their idiots, they flee with the bomb still stuck on Shu's hand. Thank kami. To think that Mai's the same age as Goku at this point…I swear anime was always weird. I go back just as Goku's done explaining about the balls.

"Y'know, I hear that the dragon is a sight to behold." I said putting my sword back in his sheath.

By now, Yamcha's probably cause Bulma's bare torso which sent him screaming into. Unlike canon, I had to no intention of letting see any more of her tonight. But I wonder how does a "badass" like him be afraid of women. Did a woman torment him or something?

Either way, Bulma gets out of the shower demanding clothes from Oolong. Of course, Oolong had no sleepwear. Then she kindly asked me, and my BlackTab was pretty low. I had to tell her it was low on power. I noticed Bulma got a little flustered.

"Look, I can go do the wash tomorrow. I might have something for you to wear for tomorrow." Oolong remarked.

"I can charge up my device to get your something, but you might have to rely on Oolong for an outfit for tomorrow." I said.

I found a plug and got the charger in to power my BlackTab. Oolong made us all drinks and I knew where this was going. However, I was prepped for this. As a warper, I can use techniques and whatnot to alter reality. Of course, any warper basically does this by entering a world, but some can heighten it to alter specific things. Basically, using my warping powers, I neutralized the sleepy grass in my juice with a mere gaze. It does a take a lot out of me, but it's worth it. I down the drink and so does everyone else.

"Oolong, you stay down here and you better NOT sneak into my room." Bulma said glaring at the pig before shifting her gaze at Ace. "Ace, I need to talk to you upstairs. Right now."

This is surprising, but I go up with her. I lean back against the wall and Bulma sits on the bed still in her towel.

"Ace, I really don't trust Oolong's word. Could you maybe stay and keep watch over me? Please." Bulma asked a bit uncomfortable.

This caught me off-guard.

"Wouldn't Goku be more appropriate for this?" I said raising an eyebrow.

I know for a fact that Goku will be knocked out, but I was rather curious on why me.

"Look, I would ask Goku, but he's too naïve. Oolong could easily fool him. Plus, you've seen me naked before. I trust you a whole lot more not to do anything to me than Oolong." Bulma admitted with a yawn.

I was actually touched by this. To be fair, I had some plans of my own. I was even debating teaming up with Oolong. However, now, I had a bit of determination to help Bulma.

"Don't worry, I'll give Oolong something to keep him busy." I said to her.

"Thanks, Ace." Bulma said throwing off the towel to go under the covers.

Bulma quickly ended up sleeping and Goku by now is probably out cold. I hurry down to stop Oolong on the chairs.

"I know you laced the drinks, Oolong." I said in a low voice.

Oolong looks terrified, but I tell him I won't tell Bulma if he doesn't go in her room. He groans that he won't have any fun, but I can give him something. Going to my BlackTab while it's plugged in, I search for an item to keep me up all night. Apparently one of my siblings had a similar idea in mind because among the items recently spawned by my siblings was a pill that give eight hours sleep instantly. Of course, I spawn it with using as little power from the house-wagon as possible. Ingesting it, I turn to Oolong.

"Look Oolong, we're cool and all, but I can't you go up there. I promised Bulma had." I said sternly.

"Oh, come on, please!" Oolong whined.

I needed a compromise and something quick. Deftly, I get a piece of paper out of my duffel bag. I drew him a lewd picture for him to ogle. Who did I draw? Nico Robin. That was enough to keep him happy. I wanted to draw Bulma, but I wanted to stay in her good grace. Now the next issue was Yamcha, so I immediately put my sword back on my side. The BlackTab needed another hour before full charge so I left it behind. Making sure my Kageyama capsule is tucked in my duffel bag and put away. I slip out the window and scale up to the roof. And here come Yamcha and Pu'ar up to the house-wagon. I would let Yamcha in and let canon happen, but no. I had to stop this, just to troll Yamcha. So, I sneak back inside to get to door sword in hand, and I open it. Yamcha was stunned to see Rakurai up to his stomach and me smirking like a madman.

"Oh hello, Yamcha. I assume you've come for our balls." I said to him. "But I am rather attached to them."

"We're talking the Dragon Balls, right?" Pu'ar said awkwardly.

"Yes, dumbass. I had a feeling you'd show your mug, so I waited." I said. "And I have a deal."

"A deal, you say?" Yamcha said curious of what I wondering.

"A one on one fight, you and me, no weapons and just our fist. If I win, you piss off for the rest of the night. If you win, I'll give you the balls no questions asked." I said seriously.

* * *

Yamcha was a thief and usually didn't really much in honor. However, Yamcha was confident he'd beat Ace in this fight. He assumed Ace was tried and sleepy unaware Ace was fully awake due to his pill. So, he accepted the terms think it was an easy win despite Pu'ar warning that he was now bound to the deal by martial artist's honor. Ace goes inside and drags out Oolong.

"Hey, what's the big deal? I was admiring Robin's bo—Why is the bandit here?!" Oolong said panicked.

"Look, I made a deal. If I beat him, he pisses off for the night. You need to keep an eye on Kitty Litter over there." Ace said crossing his arms.

Oolong wanted to whine, so Ace kindly asked Pu'ar to transform into the woman he drew. Of course, Pu'ar refused, but Oolong realized he could do just that himself. Yamcha and Ace moved a short distance away, but not before handing Rakurai to Oolong to hang on to.

The two warriors glared at each other.

"I never caught your name, brat." Yamcha said readying himself.

" **Ace Maebure Blackthorn**." Ace said cracking his knuckles.

A light breeze blew through the air, and the fighters charged ready to throw down. Both making a leap, Yamcha got the first kick to Ace's face midair. Ace landed on his feet and ran forward as they clashed with their fists. At came to a head, which Ace and Yamcha's fists came after to cause a punch parry which put their fist in a lot of pain. Ace and Yamcha howled out in pain blowing air on their fist to lessen the pain.

"I felt like I was punching a concrete wall." Yamcha said wincing.

"You were more like punching through 10, no 30 barriers of oak." Ace said glad his healing factor would fix his hand quickly.

Preparing a Sparking Touch within the hurt hand, he focused more ki into it to turn his arm into a living electric shock glove. Yamcha had tried to lay a strike on Ace, which scratched Ace, but didn't stop Ace from slamming his fist into Yamcha's stomach. Yamcha basically got hurt with the force of four tasers. With Ace pulling away, Yamcha fell over unconscious. Ace was more a tad drained due to using all that energy.

"Damn, this was intense. I'll need to train even harder to ensure I can go on. My endurance is impressive, but it can get harder." Ace said to himself.

He was glad his tail was wrapped around him like a belt. He was still training that weakness off. Pu'ar had to drag Yamcha away, and Oolong trudged off to bed leaving Ace the only one awake. Or so he thought.

He didn't notice that with all that noise, Bulma had woken up wondering what was going on.

* * *

I was panting, but I was so glad to find my BlackTab fully charged. Though, I won't tell Bulma. Much as I hate to say it, canon's got to happen with that bunny suit. I do spawn a healing item to recover. Taking my sword out of a sleeping Oolong's hand and putting it away, I go to find Bulma somewhat awake. She was up not really covering her chest with the sheet.

"Ace? What's going on and why do you look so beat up?" Bulma said noting my appearance.

"We had unwelcome guests, and no it's wasn't Oolong. That bandit guy broke in and would have come up here, but I fought him off." I said with a weak smile.

"The cute bandit hunk?! Why did you let come up?" Bulma said excitedly.

"You do realize that he was here for the balls, right?" I said with a blush. "That and Oolong would have used that as excuse to come up here."

While Oolong in canon would have been dealing with Pu'ar, I was hoping that Bulma wouldn't be mad over me repelling Yamcha. I had to threw Oolong down the river, but I was glad it worked. I was trying not to stare Bulma's milky white orbs.

"You have a good point." Bulma said defeated. "But thanks for keeping watch."

* * *

Bulma had gazed at Ace's face noting it's red color to which Bulma quickly found out why.

"How cute, he's trying not to stare, but he's being a little bad job of it. At least he's trying." Bulma thought deviously. "Maybe I could "reward" his efforts."

Bulma had a bit a devious look in her eyes saying it was ok for him to look for he earned it.

"But I think you need something more considering your state." Bulma said pointing out the tense look on Ace's face.

"I don't know if I could do this. I wouldn't want to be your first time." Ace said nervously.

"First time?" Bulma said with a chuckle. "Between you and me, I already lost that a year ago. Besides this'll be a one-night stand between us."

Ace's inner mind was yelling, " **JUST DO IT!** ", and this time Ace was going to listen. This wasn't part of his plan, but he was doing to enjoy this "bonus".

 **-Lemon Start!-**

Ace instinctively leap over to the bed leaving his shoes behind catching Bulma by surprise. Going under the sheet, he hastily between her legs.

"Woah, an eager…oh..ahnn!" Bulma said before letting out a yelp.

Ace was actively licking the folds of her flower between her legs and had no intention of stopping. Bulma was very surprised he do that first.

"For..*pants* a bumpkin, you sure know how to please a woman." Bulma said in between her moans.

"My dad once told me that when having sex, it's important to make sure a woman gets the most pleasure out of it." Ace said in between licking. "It's now he's keeps my mom coming back for more."

Bulma was curious if Ace's father was a complete stud, but wasn't able to think with Ace's continual licking. He crawled up to keep licking to grab Bulma's right breast to massage. Bulma was actually considering having him as a fuck buddy. Her juices flowed down to which Ace found delicious. More juices began to flow out of her while Ace did his best to get every drop of it before Bulma arched back with her first orgasm for the night. After she was done, Ace slurped up what was left before looking up at Bulma who gave him a weak smile.

"That was remarkable, Ace." Bulma said seeing the tent in his gi. "Now how about I get you ready."

Ace had peeled his gi off having a rather hungry look. He wanted to go all out, but he looked to Bulma.

"How do you want it? Could I go all out?" Ace asked twitching a bit.

Bulma humored him by saying he could go all out to which Ace flipped her over to take her from behind. Being the gentleman, he eased his shaft inside her before taking for a ride. A pretty long one.

Downstairs, Oolong stirred awake and looked over at the clock which showed it was barely half-past elven. Grumbling, he went over to the fridge to grab a bite to eat when he heard moaning. More specifically a woman's moaning. His gut instinct told him it was Bulma, and he crept up to get the mother of all peepshows. He had cover his mouth not to give himself away. He found an awake Bulma having sex with a very lucky Ace. Oolong couldn't believe his eyes!

"Ace, it's been a half-hour and you're still haven't given out yet." Bulma said panting. "But keep it up!"

"With pleasure!" Ace said spanking Bulma's behind.

"Do that harder." Bulma ordered.

"What? Spanking you or thrusting in you?" Ace said.

"BOTH, you pervert!" Bulma yelped out.

Ace gazed over and he clearly saw Oolong. Ace gave him a look that said, "Go downstairs or else."

Oolong wanted to stay, but he knew the risk of getting the wrath of Bulma. Plus, Ace did save them from Yamcha and got Oolong to realize he could just transform into Bulma when nobody's looking.

"You've earned it, you lucky bastard." Oolong said under his breath going back downstairs.

"You hear that?" Bulma said heated. "I swore I heard that perverted pig."

"Don't worry, I made sure he won't come up here." Ace assured reaching his limit. "But I'm about to cum!"

"Not inside me, you're not. I didn't pack birth control!" Bulma said a bit panicked. "Pull out!"

Ace kept up his violent thrusting until he pulled out his shaft and give Bulma a stream of sperm all over her body to coat the sweat. Bulma fell flat on her stomach completely exhausted with her stomach having her own orgasm right after. Ace was flaccid once again and completely exhausted. It was his first time after all.

"I think I'll go downstairs." Ace said getting up.

"You can stay up here with me. Least I do." Bulma said before slipping out cold.

With a smile of glee, he collapsed back on that bed. The two teens soaked in the juices of their sex and sweats drifted off to sleep

 **-Lemon End-**

* * *

When I woke up from my little nap (I was under the effects of the pill, so I only needed a light sleep), I looked at the naked bluenette next to me. Last night was awesome and I had something to rub in my siblings' face. If I ever saw them again. I get up actually feeling like sleeping in next to Bulma, but I go down to get my BlackTab. The date's September 7, Age 749 in this world and it's five am. Can't believe it's been a week already since I did this journey because it's feels like a month. I go up to bed and seeing Bulma like this got a mischievous idea formed.

 **(-Three Hours Later-)**

I was oh so tempted not to get up again, but I had to. Bulma awoke looking over at me.

"Morning. Sorry about all I spew all over you." I said shyly. "It was my first time."

"It's all right, but I don't remember you shooting all over my boobs like this." Bulma remarking the seed all over.

"Oh…I woke up with a bit heated so I used your chest while you asleep. Sorry about that." I admitted.

Bulma sighed saying that at least she was going to shower. So, after she and later I showered, I'm fully dressed and Bulma's in a towel. Of course, like canon, she and Oolong and she's ends up in the bunny costume getup. Oolong takes the wheel and we were off on adventure. I hurriedly eat breakfast, equip my sword and BlackTab on me. I got my duffel bag on my back as well because I knew Yamcha was going to hit us with that rocket launcher. In a few minutes, a missile wrecked the House-Wagon blowing off the driver's side knocking Bulma out cold. Goku, Oolong, and I could and Yamcha aimed an automatic rifle at me.

"It's morning now, so our deal is done. Now, hand over your balls." Yamcha said aiming it at me.

"Oh, I'm sorry, they're empty." I said with a snicker.

Only Oolong got the joke. Goku was itching to fight, and I had an idea to progress this along.

"Hey desert douchebag, if you can't beat Goku, you will never beat me. So put down the gun and fight, or are you a complete pansy?" I said goading the bandit.

However, something interesting happens. Before anyone could react, Goku up and punches Yamcha in the face, breaking out a tooth in Yamcha's face.

"My face! My beautiful gallant face!" Yamcha said aching in pain.

He retreats and with Pu'ar in tow. I go inside to wake up Bulma who's now mad we have to walk. More like they have to walk, I open up Kageyama to ride on. Goku's carrying Bulma, and Oolong had a walking stick. Being this was the desert, we were sweating like Oolong.

"Where the hell is Yamcha?" I thought trudging through the desert heat.

It was nearly twenty minutes before he found us to "apologize". He even gave us a car capsule to which Goku happily accepted and thanked him. Bulma hurriedly got in and Oolong got to driving it. As they peel away, I turn to Yamcha.

"Maybe we'll meet again because if so, I'll be happy to fight you again." I said before taking off after the gang on Kageyama.

* * *

Yamcha had a look on confusion watch Ace go.

"Pu'ar, you don't think he knows the car is bugged, right?" Yamcha said asking his best friend.

"Of course not, unless he's psychic or something?" Pu'ar responded.

"Please, psychic powers are impossible." Yamcha said confidently. "I'm just paranoid."

 _Whatever they were doing at this point, Chiaotzu and General Blue sneezed._

The desert duo got in their car to go after our "heroes" _as the journey continues!_

* * *

 **(A/N: Second time doing a lemon, first time was Pour One Out which was a Dragon Ball Z fic with Chi-Chi. Ironic. Either way, this chapter was a fun one. I decided to update with three chapters this time instead of four because it's been since last year I had a chapter you readers. I want to try to do at last 3-4 chapters during the month to post at the end of it. Yoshi3000 out.)**


	8. Meet the Bandit King and his Chi-Chi

**Chapter 8: Up the Mountains of Fire Lies Gyu Mao and his Chi-Chi**

* * *

 **(A/N: Ah, we finally reached Fire Mountain. Chi-Chi will be fun to write. I don't mention the meeting of Yamcha and Chi-Chi because it happens exactly like in canon. I happen to be a huge GoChi fan and I wanted to try to write their romance a bit better. I know that there problems with the ship and I want to try my best to fix some of them.)**

* * *

We arrived at Fire Mountain (or Fry Pan Mountain for you manga purists) and we stopped to look out at the burning mountain in the distance. I knew by now Yamcha and Chi-Chi will cross paths, but I decide to let that happen.

"So here we are, Fire Mountain." I mused. "The Gyu Mao is said to kill anyone in the area of his castle, right?"

"Of course, he will! They say he's a demon!" Oolong said to us panicked.

"Bring it on. If I don't fight strong opponents, I won't get stronger." I said cracking my knuckles.

"Ace is right! If there's a problem, we'll fight." Goku said with a smile.

So, entering the place on foot after we capsulized/sent away our modes of transport, we found the place humid. Wandering through the place, I sense something coming. I unsheathed Rakurai and with a swing blocked the flying ax that would have cleaved Bulma's head.

"Goku! Ready yourself, seems we've got company." Ace said grabbing the ax.

"I've been itching for battle!" Goku said with his Power Pole in head.

"What are you all doing around there?" The Ox King said as I threw back his ax to which he caught. "You wouldn't happen to be treasure hunters, are you?"

Bulma was stammering and Oolong sadly pissed himself. Goku and I were calm.

"Technically, we would be. But we're not here for gold or money." I said with Rakurai in my grip. "But I doubt you're going to let us explain."

"No, I won't ya little thieves." Ox-King said coming down on me with his ax.

I clashed with Rakurai. Ox-King was a mountain of man with rippling muscle and he was in his prime. I did my best to dodge and clash with Goku. Bulma was cheering us on. The ax came down again, and Goku ran up his arm to kick him. It didn't work, of course.

"Goku, get the cloud! I'll hold him off!" I said to him.

"Time to get serious. Kinto'un!" Goku yelled out.

The magical yellow cloud came down and Goku circled him. I sheathed Rakurai because I knew the fight was over.

* * *

After getting dizzy from being circled on the Nimbus, Ox-King asked Goku where he got the cloud. Thankfully, Ox-King became friendly learning he got it from Master Roshi. Ox was even impressed to hear from Ace that he was offered to train under him. Ox went into his history with Gohan and how he was a student of Roshi. Bulma and Oolong were blown away the wave of new information.

"Note to self, have Ace punch Roshi upside his head." Bulma thought darkly.

She wanted revenge.

"You must be quite strong to impress my old master, Ace." Ox said with a smile. "Not bad."

Ox-King was now jovial asking if we got get Roshi to aid in ridding the fire around his castle.

"We'll do it in exchange for a certain artifact me and my hot scientist friend in the bunny outfit." Ace said smirking. "Do we have a deal?"

"Of course! I can part with one piece of treasure to see my old master again!" Ox-King said with a hearty laugh.

"Hey Bulma, you know where Roshi lived?" Goku said curiously.

"Probably near the beach we were at." Bulma responded.

"I know where he lives." Ace said casually.

Hiding behind debris, Yamcha and Pu'ar were floored to know that Ace was offered training from Roshi. Yamcha found Ace strong, but Roshi training would make him a bigger threat.

"Well while you two are at it, could you two find my daughter, Chi-Chi? I sent her out, and she hasn't returned yet." Ox-King asked kindly.

Everyone (except Goku and Ace) snickered at how the Ox's daughter could look like. That was until Ace projected her image up out of his BlackTab.

"Like I said, I collect information about legends and stuff. Mao Chi-Chi is in my archives along with you. Finding her will be easy." Ace said. "Besides it's not like a certain desert bandit and his cat friend were near her to knock her out."

"Woah, what a cutie." Oolong said. "And the battle suit ain't too shabby."

"Totally took after the mother." Bulma mused.

"Looks strong." Goku said gawking.

"Resembles her mother so much." Ace said sympathetically turning to Ox-King. "Sorry about your wife."

"It's all right. I know Mao Tanoshī is in a better place. She passed from cancer in the lungs right after Chi-Chi was born." Ox King said sadly.

Ace found this interesting and noted it in his archives right away. He even got information to fill in the blanks canon left.

"Well Goku and I are off to find Chi-Chi and get Roshi. Oolong, try not to perv on Bulma while I'm gone." Ace warned Oolong.

"Times I wonder why you couldn't be older." Bulma said to me arms crossed.

"Bulma, it'd never work out." Ace remarked opening his Kageyama capsule.

Goku and Ace took off leaving a terrified Yamcha and Pu'ar.

"How the hell does he know?" Yamcha said under his breath. "And we need to find Chi-Chi now! If Ace tells him about what we did, Ox-King will skewer us!"

The bandit pair ran to find Chi-Chi unconscious, but still alive. Too bad, they didn't have the chance to make amends before Goku quickly found her. Yamcha and Pu'ar had to hide. Goku hopped off his Nimbus and awoke Chi-Chi. The girl opened her eyes staring up into Goku's black spheres to which Goku stared back. In another time and space, Goku would have completely dense to this, but here and now, he noticed a warrior's spirit in her that drew him in. He didn't realize it was attraction yet.

"You must be Chi-Chi, right?" Goku said helping her up. "I'm Son Goku."

"Yeah, thanks for help you. Some jerk knocked me out." Chi-Chi said dusting herself.

"Well whoever he was, ain't here now. Your dad us sent out to find you and help you and get Master Roshi." Goku remarked hopping on the cloud. "Hop on if the cloud will accept you."

Chi-Chi beamed trying to get on grabbing Goku's tail. Now normally, this was be his weak point. Ace thought ahead to train that weakness off Goku. At best, it sent a jolt up his body, but that's it.

"Careful, there's sensitive." Goku said helping her up. "But the cloud accepted you, that's great."

"Wait, you said us?" Chi-Chi said remembering Goku's early statement.

Coming up behind them was Ace, who was watching his little scene play out.

"Yo, Miss Mao. Name's Ace, Goku's bash brother." Ace said making a brief introduction.

Soon enough, the trio were on their way to Master Roshi's with Ace taking the lead. However, he was contemplating.

* * *

I discovered some "interesting" facts about Mao Tanoshī. She came from a line of people who were known to be stamina freaks to the inhuman degree. Apparently, her wedding night with the Ox lasted three whole days of non-stop sex. They said he was so drained, he couldn't hoard gold or rob anyone for a whole week. She was also a fierce warrior robbing and killing alongside her husband. All and all, she was terrifying. As for now, I gaze over at Chi-Chi. I groan seeing the battle bikini armor. I swear Ox-King is a lunkhead for giving her that. It shows off the curves too much. I did make a mental note to get Chi-Chi in that armor as an adult. I don't care how, but I will. Speaking of adult, I really did need to get those two some major improvement. While canon likes to play their marriage is great, it rather isn't most of the time and I'm an GoChi fan saying that. I had a plan though. One to get Goku less dense, and one for Chi-Chi to be less abrasive in the future. While I was planning this, I look back to see Chi-Chi swat Goku into the dirt and Chi-Chi crashing the Nimbus.

Ugh, he must have done "Pat Pat" again. This time, I was going to teach after that. This was the last time it was useful anyway.

"Ugh, sorry." Goku said rubbing his head.

"You could have asked." Chi-Chi said with a blush as the two were back on the Nimbus.

I could see the blossoming of love in her and I even stopped to savour the moment. Such a sweet moment. Got even better.

"Chi-Chi, you've got some strength. How about we fight someday?" Goku asked.

Real smooth, Goku. He was flirting and didn't know it.

"If you want, dear. I'll show you my moves." Chi-Chi said with a blush.

* * *

Ace would have found it adorable, but too bad he had somewhat of a dirty mind. Soon they were over ocean, and Ace was glad I installed a hover feature so he can ride over water. The air feature wasn't finished, but he was glad this was.

"All this ocean seems endless." Goku said. "Nothing but water for miles."

"Most of the planet is water." Ace remarked. "Just follow me, I know where the old man lives."

Ace revved up and blasted on ahead.

"Goku, I just love this cloud." Chi-Chi said holding him a little snug.

Goku didn't know how to react to this new feeling. Ace had told him long ago about a feeling you'd get for another person, but Goku forgot the name. Whatever it was, Goku liked the feeling.

"Thanks, Chi-Chi." Goku said warmly.

"Yo, lovebirds. Roshi's up ahead!" Ace said pointing up to Roshi's island.

Roshi was sitting in a lawn chair reading up on a book on martial arts instead of women in skimpy clothes while Turtle was taking in the sun. That's when Ace rode in on Kageyama with Goku and Chi-Chi arriving just after.

"Yo Ero-sennin, good to see you again. I'm not here about the offer yet, but I came because someone needs your help." Ace said putting down the kickstand.

 _Will Ace, Goku, and Chi-Chi get the help they need? What changes to canon will happen next? Is Yamcha going to be trolled by Ace forever? Maybe. Find out, next time on Dragon Ball Blackthorned!_

* * *

(A/N: Had fun making this chapter, I just hope I did the GoChi a bit better. I can only hope for the best.)


	9. The Trademark Attack!

**Chapter 9: The Trademark Attack**

* * *

 _ **(A/N: I've been looking forward to this chapter. This one will probably be the most interesting of the bunch.)**_

* * *

Master Roshi seemed pretty happy to see us. He asked me if I was here about his training, but I shook my head.

"I'm here to get you to come to Gyu Mao's castle to put out the people. I'd ask for the Bansho Fan, but it's cooler to have you to come yourself." I said to him.

I already knew the fan was tossed out due to bad Wonton soup, and I wanted to get this handled quickly. The introductions and deal happened and we were all on our way back to Fry-Pan Mountain. I had no intention of letting Roshi near Bulma to feel her breasts and was already deviously planning. We had returned back to the mountain and Roshi got off to puke. While Roshi was talking with Ox King, I dragged Bulma to the side.

"Bulma, Roshi took advantage of Goku's naviete to make a deal involving you." I said crossing my arms.

"All right, what does the old pervert want?" Bulma said already annoyed.

"He wants to fondle your tits." I said bluntly.

"Damn old man!" Bulma spat.

"But I have a plan, but we'll need Oolong's help." I said. "We're going to give him another "woman" to grope."

Bulma seemed to like the way I was talking and got Oolong to me right away. I explained the plan, but he didn't want to go through with it.

"Oolong, if you do this. I'll draw a lewd picture of Bulma! Whatever fetish you want!" I said holding him by the collar. "Please."

Oolong agreed and Bulma was willing to forgive me for it. Now I wasn't sure if my warping powers worked that way, but I willing to try anything once. Taking Oolong's hand, I focused my warping energy and tried to make it flow.

* * *

Ace's attempt would result in Oolong being coated a blue energy as Ace told him to just try to the transform.

"Change, NOW!" Oolong said as he dispersed in a cloud of orange cloud.

Ace's warping energy had overrided Oolong's own desire to transform into Bulma. Instead, there stood a very tall, slender woman with long black hair that extends past her waist with locks of hair that frame her face down to her chin, pale skin, large breasts that put Bulma's own to shame, a high forehead, dark blue eyes that have long, voluminous lashes, and a narrow waist. Oolong was now in a revealing red blouse that showed much of her chest and a loose sarong that exposed her long, slender legs with a green symbol adorned on it. Yes, Ace had overridden Oolong's transformation to turn him into Boa Hancock.

It was something when Bulma who is completely straight was ogling the form Oolong got. Ace pulled up the mirror app on his BlackTab to show Oolong the form. He had a nosebleed.

"Holy shit, I look gorgeous." Oolong said. "And how did my voice change?"

"Seems it worked. I merely had the thought in mind so I overrode your desire to turn into Bulma through my willpower. Seems I overdid it because you're an exact copy down to the voice." Ace said sheepishly.

"Who the hell is she?" Bulma asked demandly of Ace.

"Boa Hancock. She's a character in a manga I read." Ace said sweating a bit.

Bulma was relived glad that she didn't actually exist. If Ace could get away with it, he'd be laughing. Ace went over to call Roshi to complete the deal. To say, the sight of Oolong was enough to get blood trickling down his nose.

"What's the size on her?!" Roshi said in a heated whisper.

"She's a J-cup, Roshi. Enjoy!" Ace said.

Bulma was slackjawed by that revelation. It made her feel like she was flat chested. However, she was glad she didn't have to deal with the old pervert.

"You owe me one again." Ace said looking up at her.

"Sure…whatever you want." Bulma said wistfully.

Afterwards, Roshi had preformed the Max Power Kamehameha wave to put out the fire. Ace had to put on shades due to it's cool factor. Yamcha and Pu'ar were stunned to see it. Roshi sat down exhausted from using the technique.

"That was so cool!" Goku cheered. "Can you teach me?"

"Sorry, kid. That technique will take 50 years to learn it." Roshi said to him.

"Bullshit." Ace said crossing his arms. "It's doable in 50 seconds."

So, Ace cupped his hands drawing to his side and his ki was concentrated into a single point between his hands. The energy in hand had a taint of green with the blue.

"KAME-HAME-HA!" Ace said firing the blueish-green energy beam up into the sky.

Goku did the same copying Ace, and both blast came down and blew up the car Yamcha gave them. Why? Because the universe screws over anything related to Yamcha. So Oolong, still in Hancock's form, had to put up with Roshi again a distance away. Ox-King give them a hovercar to aid our heroes after Ace found the Seven-Star Dragon Ball.

* * *

I took Bulma aside because I did want to leave Goku and Chi-Chi to talk by themselves. The Ox-King had already left to check on the remains on his castle. I dragged Bulma a good distance away.

"What is it this time? You want another pafu pafu?" Bulma said to me.

"It was more to give Goku some time alone with Chi-Chi." I said to her. "I'm a good wingman. Plus, I can get you some new clothes."

Bulma perked up at that. I knew that bunny suit was the reason we got in trouble with the Rabbit Gang in the first place. I still intend to have us deal with them through. So, what outfit did I put her in? Well since we're going back in the deserts, I got her a black tank top, black skinny jeans and high-heeled suede boots. She squeed at the boots, and I had the joy watching her fling the bunny costume to put the new outfit on. To complete the outfit, I spawned a gray military jacket, with fasteners on the collar and underneath her chest, which have a dull, off-metallic feel with the sleeve cuffs also having fastener buttons. The outfit itself was one good thing from that piece of crap Metroid game that I won't name.

"What do you think?" Ace said beaming the bunny costume into his BlackTab to store behind her back.

"Anything's better than that bunny get up, and the jacket's a nice touch." Bulma said to me.

I would have given her regular pants, but her behind looked fine in those skinny jeans. I'd gain points with Oolong, and I kind of needed it considering he's probably getting molested by Roshi.

* * *

Goku and Chi-Chi had walked over to the lake talking about common interests and so forth. However, the Dragon Ball Gang all gathered to the hovercar to ready themselves to go back on the road. Ace was on Kageyama and Goku was on his Nimbus.

"Chi-Chi, I'll really miss you. Maybe we'll meet again someday." Goku said still holding her hand.

"Maybe when we're older, you could take me as your bride." Chi-Chi said with a faint blush.

"Sure…if that's what you want." Goku said taking letting her go to take off after Oolong and Bulma. "See ya."

Everyone said their goodbyes to Chi-Chi and Ox-King and left except for Ace who hadn't left yet though.

"Yo, Chi-Chi. Goku thinks bride is some kind of food, y'know. He's kind of an idiot at times." Ace said to her.

Chi-Chi paled.

"But don't worry, I'll explain it to him and keep an eye on him. Just one thing, you'll owe me for this." Ace said with a smirk.

"Of course! I'd be indebted to you!" Chi-Chi said frantic.

That's what Ace wanted to hear and assured Chi-Chi it'd be fine.

"I have some advice. Goku likes strong women. Considering your mom was a warrior, you could get some training. You have potential for great strength one day, Chi-Chi. Other than that, just be yourself. Maybe you'll see us again sooner than you think. Later!" Ace said before taking off on Kageyama.

"Thanks Ace!" Chi-Chi said.

Ox-King waved goodbye. But where was Roshi? Well he went a little too far on Oolong. When Roshi dropped his pants, Oolong snapped and beat him senseless. When Roshi was out cold, Oolong returned to his original form. So now, Roshi was unconscious, beaten, and had his pants down. Ox-King and Chi-Chi was left awkwardly wondering how the hell did that happen.

* * *

I was driving Kageyama catching up with Goku and the others when I passed Yamcha and Pu'ar in their own hovercar. I give the two a glare and blasted off leaving them in the dust. I had caught up to Bulma, Oolong, and Goku.

"Bulma, if we skip this town up ahead to the next one, we might be able to get some luxury capsules up ahead. There's also a good dressmaker to get some spare clothes just in case." I said to her.

Now I know this would perk her interest to skip the town. Then I drove over to next to Goku.

"Goku, we need to talk. Just between us bros." I said to him.

"What about, Ace?" Goku said flying the cloud closer to me.

"It's about Chi-Chi...and the bride thing. Bride's not a food." I said bluntly.

"Oh then, what is it?" Goku asked.

This would be hard to say, but I would try anyway.

"She wants to be your partner in life walking the path of a warrior with you. She cares about you. She's basically your soulmate." I said in a low whisper.

"So, like a friend…but closer than that." Goku said in thought.

I decided to roll with it and say yes. I could just tell him more later on when he got older. As I look into the distance to the upcoming village, I gazed over to Goku and I swear he had a bit of a blush in his cheeks while in thought.

* * *

(A/N: GoChi bits! I wanted to mix the Funimation dub along with the original Japanese dubbing in the lines with Goku and Chi-Chi's goodbyes. This chapter I did feels rather short though.)


	10. Rabbits in the Hood!

**Chapter 10: Rabbits in the Hood**

* * *

 **(A/N: This one's also not going to be too long. This one will be up there for the most changes from canon. On another note, 10th chapter!)**

* * *

We rolled into the town controlled by the Rabbit Mod, but the gang didn't know that. I fully intended on dealing with them on my own. Bulma went off to shop, Oolong went off to refuel the hovercar, and Goku ran off to get food to eat. Leaving me free to do as I please. I wander around town and found two Rabbit thugs assaulting a random townswoman. Apparently, they wanted to see what's under her desert robes. What's with people not asking nicely? I confront them.

* * *

Aisha just wanted to buy groceries but had the misfortune of running into Rabbit Three and Rabbit Four. These two, like the rest of the Rabbit Gang, just loved abusing power. They already yanked her headscarf showing her short black hair when Ace came up.

"Hey brat, piss off we're…" Rabbit Three said before Ace smashed his fist into the thug's stomach knocking the breath out of him. "Guurrrkk!"

Rabbit Three fall over and Ace slashed the throat of Rabbit Four with Rakurai letting the mobster choke on his own blood. Aisha would have been horrified, but she was just glad she wasn't humiliated any further. Ace turned to her and helped with the groceries giving them back to her.

"Miss, you know I can stash the bodies." Ace asked her.

Aisha pointed to a dumpster to which Ace turned them into before walking the woman home. Aisha lived alone and was grateful for Ace's help.

"Thank you very much for helping me back there." Aisha said putting away her groceries.

"It's of no issue. I came here specifically to rid the town of the Rabbit Mob." Ace said sparking surprise. "And I came full aware of how to do that."

"Well, you are intrepid. I wish there was some way to thank you." Aisha said before noticing Ace was eyeing her.

She blushed in mortification over this.

"There is maybe one thing you could do." Ace said with a smirk.

* * *

Well, I asked her for direction to the grocery store. What? You thought I was going to ask for something dirty. Well she was about to be assaulted, so I couldn't ask that. I went to the grocery store buying items for my mini-fridge. Hopping on Kageyama, I took off to meet up with Bulma, Goku, and Oolong. Right on cue, the Rabbit douches came up to Bulma asking for lewd favors while hitting on her. Considering bunnies are spastic breeders, I'm not surprised.

"Ugh, I like my men who are mature." Bulma touted. "Goku, Ace, please get rid of them."

"Ok." Goku said swatting one of them with his pole.

I slashed the other one's stomach leaving a pretty nasty wound. So, they say they'll call his boss.

"Finally, bring the Rabbit bastard out here so that I may deal with him." I said viciously.

As their boss rolled up in his stupid-looking car, I didn't warn Bulma about his freaky powers. Mostly because I need Yamcha to help us. So, Monster Rabbit comes out and eyes us down.

"Yo. So, you the guys causing all the ruckus?" He says.

"Yeah, your men are complete creeps, and I'm underage!" Bulma fumed.

"Wait, isn't the age of consent 13 or something?" Oolong asked curiously.

"What's consent?" Goku asked. "Is that a food?"

"No, Goku. I'll explain later when you're older." I said dryly.

"Well allow me to apologize on behalf of my men. Allow me to shake your hand to show my utmost apologizes." Monster Rabbit said offering his hand.

Bulma shook it and got turned into a carrot. I snatched it before the rabbit man could leaving Goku to attack. Yamcha and Pu'ar jump out of hiding to help us. Oolong took off in the hovercar but not before I toss him Carrot Bulma.

I was going to deal with Monster Rabbit who leapt at me touching me square on the head. Too bad being a warper has the privilege of willpower which made his ineffective.

"But…how?!" Monster Rabbit asked.

I don't answer, but I focused ki with my bio-electricity into my hand.

"Let's shake on it." I said grabbing his hand. "Sparking Touch!"

I let off electricity which electrocuted him until his fur was brunt to a crisp to which I put my sword up to his neck.

"You have one chance to walk away with your life. Turn my friend back and leave this village forever. Or I can behead you." I said having Rakurai inch closer to his neck.

"You got a deal." The rabbit asked snapping his fingers.

* * *

Carrot Bulma returned to normal, but with one catch. She was stark naked, and Oolong was thanking Kami for this. Bulma was screaming bloody murder. Changing into the desert girl clothes (the canon clothes, she'd be wearing by now), she took control driving back to the scene. Yamcha and Pu'ar bolted when Bulma, with Ace waving them good-bye and Goku thanking them.

"Where's that rabbit guy?!" Bulma demanded. "I'm going to kill him!"

"Already did." Ace said with a smirk. "He's long gone."

Bulma seemed happy for that and remarked at least she still has the Dragon Balls and her new capsules. The village was ecstatic to find the Rabbit Gang was gone holding a celebration. Good times all around except for Oolong who got beaten by Bulma for ogling her. Soon our heroes left, with Aisha especially waving goodbye to Ace.

"Maybe I should see her again someday." Ace thought riding away on Kageyama. "Maybe."

Behind them was Yamcha and Pu'ar still on the chase. Ace was excited for this saga was soon to be over when Emperor Pilaf being next up. Ace had plans that by the time they defeated Pilaf, those three would piss themselves at the mention of his name.

* * *

(A/N: Ten chapters of this, I'm happy that this saga is almost over. I have to admit that it gets easer from here. Originally, I was going to have Ace kill off Monster Rabbit, but I have other plans for him instead. Heh.)


	11. Pilaf, Ace hardly took ye seriously(end)

**Chapter 11: Pilaf, Ace hardly took ye seriously (The Arc Finale)**

* * *

 ** _(A/N: The finale of the Emperor Pilaf Saga, and I am feeling good about this. Remember when Pilaf was a threat? I do. Ace doesn't.)_**

* * *

So, we were riding on through the desert. I was riding Kageyama. I knew what was coming and honestly, I was hoping for it to happen. I badly wanted to get to training with Roshi. Besides, when was Pilaf after a threat? Only when he released a greater evil. Pilaf's basically a goofball.

"So Bulma, what are you going to wish for on the dragon?" Oolong asked her.

"I'm going to wish for the world's greatest boyfriend." Bulma said with a confident smirk.

"Remind us again how we benefit from that?" I ask sarcastically.

"You got to travel." Bulma said.

"And nearly get killed for your greed, you bitch. We should wish for wealth, so we all get a share." Oolong chided.

"Yeah, traveling was fun!" Goku said with his heartful chuckle.

"Oh, when this ends, I'll take my payment…out your ass." I said sniggering.

Bulma blushed at that, Oolong was laughing, and Goku was clueless. Classic. Good thing, I "borrowed" Bulma's Dragon Radar.

* * *

In Pilaf's Castle, Pilaf was pacing with his Dragon Ball while Mai was scrambling to fix the Global Dragon Radar when was falling apart. Mai wasn't no programmer and was failing at getting it to work. Programming was Shu's specialty.

"Mai, I swear if you don't fix it, I'll feed you to the alligators." Pilaf said gesturing to the alligators in a glass case.

"Pilaf-sama, if you do that, how am I going to cook your meals?" Mai said. "I was going to make stew."

"Oh right, I can't feed you yet. I need that delicious stew!" Pilaf said drooling. "The succulent meat, spiced potatoes, and add the ramen."

After kicking the panel, the machine started working once again. Detecting a Dragon Ball, Mai relayed the instructions to Shu. His response? Tackle Pilaf to take his ball. Before Pilaf could call out the boneheaded action, a robot messenger bird flew to inform that six balls are nearby.

-(A Few Minutes Later)-

Mai was standing on a mushroom watching our "heroes" drive by in the hovercar, motorcycle, and cloud.

"What a bunch of weridos, and they're just kids." Mai said to herself before issuing the attack.

Shu, in a Pilaf Machine, fired a missile which sent Bulma and Oolong to the searing ground and destroying the hovercar. Ace's Kageyama was scratched and that pissed him off. Goku was unharmed. Shu came out in the mech to snag the briefcase with the Dragon Balls and Bulma's DynoCaps.

"You bastard! You scratched my bike!" Ace said saddened.

Then he switched to a pissed off tone screaming, "I'll tear your limbs off and feed them to you!"

Shu was smart to ditch the machine after Ace and Goku took chase because Goku assumed the machine was the person and Ace was busy tearing the machine apart to fix Kageyama's minor damage.

"Sorry Bulma, but if it makes you feel better, I still have mine in my sack." Goku said pointing to his sack tied to his Power Pole.

"And I have the Radar." Ace said riding back to group on a fixed Kageyama. "Those douchebags owe me for paint!"

"Well how are going to get there? Your bike can only take one thing person and Oolong's not pure enough to ride the Nimbus." Bulma said to Ace.

* * *

I told Bulma that I pegged for help. That was a blatant lie, but Yamcha showed up. Bulma went all squee and excited to see Yamcha diving in the car with him. She was thanking me for getting him to help. Before Yamcha could say a word, I raise my sword to say don't a damn thing. So soon after we were off on to Pilaf's castle. I had the Dragon Radar to prevent that little scene between Bulma and Yamcha. I was personally dedicated to make Yamcha's life hell. We arrived at the castle, and I knew there were traps. I had a plan though. I waited outside and tossed Bulma the radar letting them all ahead of me. I return Kageyama to it's capsule to put it my duffel bag. I knew they were running into a trap, and so I had planned ahead.

* * *

Goku, Bulma, Oolong, Yamcha, and Pu'ar were trapped in a room. Goku and Yamcha were punching the walls to no avail.

"I bet that asshole, Ace, knew about this trap." Oolong said.

"Ace! He's not trapped! He could save us!" Bulma said overjoyed.

Pilaf came up as the video screen immediately taking Bulma by a robotic arm into the main room. Bulma saw Ace sneaking past, and he mouthed distract them. Ace slipped away.

"Now where's the Four Star Ball?" Pilaf demanded.

"Fuck you, you blue imp bastard!" Bulma said flipping off the emperor.

"My mother was married, you harpy! I'll just have to give you "The Treatment"." Pilaf said darkly.

Shu and Mai were frightened as Pilaf…blew a kiss at Bulma. Shu and Mai turned away in embarrassment. It's the moment that pretty much killed their credibility as a threat to Bulma. In fact, she was mad and disappointed. Oolong was too, he already had his pants down to "enjoy" the show. Now he had to pull them back up dissatisfied. Hell, Shu and Mai were acting like kids like what Pilaf was a big deal. Ironic, that Mai (and possibly Shu and Pilaf) were the same age as Goku at this point.

"So you ready to talk?" Pilaf said to her.

Bulma darkened.

" **Are you freaking kidding me? Blowing me a kiss? Oh please! You're weren't going to strip me naked, make me blow you and your ninja hounds, or at least 69 your female minion!** " Bulma fumed.

"Yeah, you tell them!" Oolong and Yamcha in unison.

Pilaf, Shu, and Mai were blushing and pale over Bulma's triade.

"Dear kami, what a perv." Mai said under her breath.

"You said it." Shu said in agreement.

"Augh, what a diseased mind you have! How could you think of such hideous acts?" Pilaf said before using the arm to return Bulma to her cell.

He turned to his cohorts.

"I fear we've met someone worse than that minion who tells Dr. Slump jokes!" Pilaf said to them.

"Sir, may I suggest using Yellow #3 to knock them out and we could search them?" Mai suggested.

"That was my next plan, now hop to it." Pilaf said with a bead of sweat down his head.

Sleeping gas poured into the room slowly knocking out each member of the Dragon Ball Gang. Then like a moron, Pilaf walks in their prison without a gas mask. Mai and Shu walk in with gas masks to begin the search. The sight of Yamcha brought a brief blush to Mai's face.

"Between the Dragon Ball might be between his legs." Mai said hiding her blush under her gas mask.

"I hate dirty jo…" Pilaf said before he falls over asleep.

They began searching until they found Goku's ball. Before the Gang woke up, the Pilaf Gang left leaving them trapped. In a few hours, they were ready to summon the dragon. Too bad, they forgot about Ace and didn't know Goku fired a Kamehameha in the wall for Oolong and Pu'ar to escape as bats.

* * *

So the trio summoned the dragon, that was good. Exactly in the spot like in canon, I buried myself under their feet, and I jumped out scaring the three.

"I am the Eternal Dragon, speak forth your wish! But be warned, I can grant only one!" Shernon spoke.

"Mighty dragon, I wish for my sword to be able to have elemental powers! Please!" I yelled at the top of my lungs.

"Wait, what?!" Pilaf, Shu, Mai, Pu'ar, and Oolong say in shock.

"Your wish is within my power and shall be granted!" Shernon said.

A bolt of lightning came down on Rakurai and it seemed to connect with my BlackTab. On Rakurai's metal, craved into it was "破壊的要素" (Destructive Element). It looked even cooler than I thought.

"Your wish is granted. I bid thee farewell, and a thank you. No one had asked nicely in years." Shernon said to me.

"Oh, you'll be seeing my face again soon. So it's only fair." I said with a bow.

Shernon even smiled before vanishing and the Dragon Balls scattered. Pilaf was furious, but I didn't care. I bolted leaving canon (or what's left) to happen. The Gang were in that steel trap and Pilaf's gang of dumbasses were asleep. Now, I stood on top on the cage.

"Hey guys." I said calmly.

"Ace, you ass! You stole my wish for a boyfriend." Bulma yelled. "And I let you have fun on the trip."

"It was that, or let Oolong wish for you naked in a hotel room for him to screw!" I snapped back.

"Damn it, I was going to wish for panties! That would have been a better idea!" Oolong exclaimed.

Bulma kicked him up into the ceiling.

"Actually, I'm here to tell you a legend. Or Goku is because there's a full moon out tonight." I said.

"Oh yeah, there was a monster that comes out on a full moon. Smashed Grandpa's big house and killed him. I don't remember, but I was asleep though the whole thing after I looked up at the moon." Goku said casually.

Ace mouthed it was rather was Goku who transformed, but has no idea to the gang just to scare them. They told him not to look up, but I told him to anyway. Why? I wanted to be a dick to Pilaf. So while Goku was about to start his transformation, I ran off. Bulma was swearing a stream of profanity, but she'd forgive for this. In Pilaf's Castle, I snag jewels and cash for Bulma. Diamonds are Bulma's best friend. Then I get to Pilaf's room. He and his cohorts were asleep. Perfect. I look over at Mai who's in her nightdress. Still can't believe she's younger than me. Carefully, I steal her panties right out between her legs. Those were for Oolong. After, I wake them up, and Pilaf is mad to see me.

"By the end of this, you will fear me. Because I brought an army." I boasted.

"You and what army?" Pilaf said with their guns raised.

Oozaru Goku tore apart as he bellowed a great howl. I smugly smirked and pointed to him.

"That army." I said.

They screamed frantic to flee to which they did. I made sure to rig their plane which a note.

"Screw you, Pilaf. Love, Ace."

Heh. I was such an asshole. I go down to rejoin the Gang, and get them to safety. I let Goku go on a rampage throughout the castle.

"Wait, you have a tail too? Why aren't you transforming?" Oolong asked me.

"Simple, I'm wearing someone to block the moon's blutz waves. I only had enough materials to make one, and no, I can't make one for Goku." I said to him.

I could make one for Goku, but I didn't want to. Canon came first. So, I finally slice off Goku's tail with Rakurai, returning him to normal. He was naked, asleep and peaceful.

"We'd better not tell him that he stamped his grandpa to death. It would just break his little heart." Bulma said to everyone. "I assume that's why Ace didn't tell him."

I nodded.

"I'm sorry, I took the wish. I had to, but I have something to make up for it." I said.

Then Pilaf showed up with Mai and Shu.

"My castle is ruined! I'll kill you all for it." Pilaf said with a gun in hand.

I turned to them and glared at them. I raised Rakurai and the metal grew hot as the desert sun before bursting into flames.

"Run." I spoke.

Pilaf, Shu, and Mai took off running.

"Damn." Oolong said. "I'd hate to see you transform."

"I can, and unlike Goku, I can control it." I said to them. "I was with Gohan when he was dying. I swore to keep the secret of how he died until Goku was an adult."

Everyone nodded.

"Before we set camp for the night, I got something for Oolong. Bulma, I have something for you too." I said pulling out Mai's panties. "For Oolong, I stole it off Mai."

"Awesome!" Oolong said taking the panties in his hand.

"They are worn because I took off of her while she was asleep. She is literally going commando right now." I said with a smirk.

Oolong's eyes twinkled as he hugged me.

"I will treasure these forever." Oolong said putting it over his head.

"Ace, that's disgusting." Bulma said to me.

I opened my duffel bag and pour out the diamonds. Bulma's mood changed and I got pelted with so much kisses that Yamcha was jealous. Didn't help I was smugly smiling at him. It's then we set up camp, and I was glad that Pilaf was dealt with. I got the pleasure of "guarding" Bulma in her room in the capsule house we found. Yamcha had to sleep on the couch with Pu'ar and Oolong. I was in her room with her. Yamcha might become her boyfriend tomorrow, but I made sure to ride Bulma as much as I could that night. Bulma wanted me to go just as much.

* * *

Bulma woke up with her legs sore from the sexual encounter from Ace last night. Bulma got dressed, and got Ace awake. He dressed and bolted out for Goku. Using his BlackTab, he spawn a pair blue pants, black shoes, and white tank top for Goku to wear. Ace went ahead to retrieve the Power Pole as Goku awoke.

"What happened last night? I remember looking at the moon and then nothing." Goku said getting up noticing his tail is gone. "Where's my tail? Did it run away?"

Goku found the clothes Ace left and put them on. Bulma was still sore from both the session she had with Ace and not getting her boyfriend wish. Yamcha was sore from the couch and still being shy with girls. Both of them looked to them to decided might as well. Ace returned to see the two making eyes at each other.

"Yamcha, you dumb bastard. I'll make sure to keep Bulma warm while you're not paying attention to her." Ace thought. "Geez, when I become salty."

"Congrats." I said dryly. "Either way, the Dragon Balls are gone for a year disguised as stones. So our quest is over for now."

"That means Grandpa's Ball is gone." Goku said sadly.

I nodded.

"So me and Goku are leaving you guys. We'll go see Roshi and get training." I said released Kageyama out it's capsule. "I assume you all are going to West City."

"Uh…yeah. We are. I figure I'd let Yamcha move in." Bulma said to me surprised I knew where she lived.

"Yeah, well. Be seeing you. I'll visit." I said with a smirk. "I'll miss the times we had."

Bulma blushed and Yamcha was confused. Yamcha sent a jet out of his capsule and everyone (except me and Goku) climbed in. Goku called up his Nimbus, and I got Kageyama. We took off together before bidding goodbye once more before we took to our separate ways. I was going to miss Bulma and Oolong and so was Goku.

"Well Goku, let's pass by the house to get some stuff. Then it's off to Roshi." I said jetting off on Kageyama.

"Right." Goku said keeping up on his Nimbus. "There are certainly a lot of different people in this world."

* * *

 _ **(A/N: The Emperor Pilaf Saga is done at last. This chapter is a complication of the final episodes/manga chapters of it. This was a blast to write and I want to thank you all of you for your support. There will be one bonus chapter, call it a gift!)**_


	12. Bonus (GoChi) - An Early Visit

**Bonus Chapter: An Early Visit**

* * *

 _ **(A/N: Originally, this was going to a lime between Ace and Chi-Chi, but I ultimately decided not to.)**_

* * *

"And we'll be meeting more Goku, soon." I said to him.

"Hey Ace, can we pass to see Chi-Chi?" Goku asked.

That was a surprise. He wanted to see her! Well this was an interesting development. Well Chi-Chi was rather happy to see Goku.

* * *

In a field, down Fry-Pan Mountain, Goku and Chi-Chi were talking. Ace was about some distance away waiting on Kageyama. Goku was done telling Chi-Chi about his wild adventure.

"Goku! You were so brave. I don't think if I could have done the same." Chi-Chi mused.

"Of course, you could!" Goku said rather encouraging.

"Well I just asked my father to start training me in martial arts. He seemed scared at first, but relented. He kept murmuring about me ending up like my mother." She said to him.

"Me and Ace are going to see Master Roshi to train under him." Goku said before calling up his Nimbus. "Which is why we can't say longer."

To Ace's surprise, Chi-Chi pulled Goku in a surprise kiss to bid him goodbye. Goku took off, but Ace stayed behind to talk to Chi-Chi alone.

"Good thing, you didn't tell him about my advice." Ace said to her.

Chi-Chi chuckled and bowed.

"Well I wouldn't. But, I could never forget your help and kindness, Ace-sama. I am still forever indebted to you." Chi-Chi said with respect.

Ace was floored with the respect and the dark part of his mind wanted to take advantage. However, he decided not to act on it. Instead, bidding goodbye telling to keep up her training and taking off on Kageyama.

* * *

This will probably the last time, I see her in that battle bikini. I realized that I needed a girlfriend of my own, but that's an issue I'll have to deal with in the future. For now, I'll stick with fooling around with Bulma behind Yamcha's back. As for Chi-Chi, maybe…just maybe I work the nerve.

* * *

 **(A/N: Yeah, a little GoChi for you all. I wanted to do a little lime where Ace teaches Chi-Chi about boys, but decided against it. It wouldn't have went as far as what he did to Bulma, but I shrugged it off. If there is interest, I could write something later down the line.)**

 **Next time on Dragon Ball Blackthorned, the** **Tournament Saga** **!**


End file.
